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lolbye000ParticipantOctober 8, 2013 at 4:08 am #40761
So I’ve been seeing this guy for a month. Out of every guy I’ve been involved with him and I have the most chemistry. He doesn’t play games, and would text me just about every day. I never had to question his interest. He would make me dinner, say the right things, and make plans to see me every single weekend. I have spent the night with him almost every weekend and each time he is very respectful and has not attempted to have sex with me, which to me meant he was in it for more than just that. He has told me several times how much he likes me, everything he likes about me and how I’m the perfect girl for him and that I”m the first girl in 4 years that has made him even think about being in a relationship.
Now on to the bad parts.
He has a reputation as a bad boy. He parties really hard, has a history with drug use and is known to be non committal despite the fact he was in a 4 year long relationship in high school. (He is 21 and I am 19) On Friday I took him to a party with me and my friend and we both got pretty drunk. My friend told me he was flirting with other girls and I did notice him talking to one girl and I felt a little jealous. My friend made a big deal about it to me and in my drunken state I started crying in one of the bedrooms. He came and found me in the room and I tried to act like I was fine, and pulled it together to talk to him. I told him what my friend had said and then proceeded to ask him whether or not he was open to a relationship at some point, or if this was all just fun and games for him. He was blacked out drunk and was telling me he felt like he was making a huge mistake but wasn’t ready for a relationship. I told him that I just wanted him to be happy and to make whatever decision he felt he had to and he kept saying how he felt like he was making a huge mistake. Throughout the rest of the night we kept trying to talk about this and he would pull me outside to talk and I never really got a striaght answer from him because he would go from being all affectionate and kissing me and saying he just wants to hang out with me to saying things like “I can’t give you want you want”. I ended up going back with him and we just went straight to bed.
The next morning we woke up and he kissed me on the forehead. He said he felt like he said a lot of stupid things last night but was completely blacked out and doesn’t remember a thing. We didn’t talk about it. I did bring up him flirting with girls and he seemed to be really surprised by that and felt really bad and said the only girl he was trying to flirt with there was me. We hung out for a couple of hours and he was very affectionate with me, very normal, and we kissed a lot and he couldn’t keep his hands off of me like usual. I thought everything was totally fine. He even asked what my plans were for the rest of the day and that he wanted to hang out next weekend as well.
Well that was the last I heard from him. It is now Monday night and he has not contacted me once. This is odd for him to go this long without talking to me. I know its a long post but I guess I dont really know what to do. My friends say this guys behavior is totally unacceptable and I should just write him off. But….I dont know if he remembers me mentioning committment and that drove him off completely, or if he is just wanting space…I have no idea. What should I do??
Nervous4lifeParticipantOctober 10, 2013 at 4:45 pm #40764
Did you text him and ask him if he was ok? What night was the party?
gbSWFBUIoParticipantOctober 16, 2013 at 10:29 am #41273
You might want to ask yourself if you are ready for a lot more nights of crying and being insecure because that is what you face when you are with an alcoholic. Blacking out regularly is never a good sign.
KaitieParticipantOctober 16, 2013 at 7:46 pm #41345
I would get out of that situation and not look back. You have only been together for a month and there are already some flags going up. He is probably not going to stop partying anytime soon, and you are going to deal with a lot more of this.
AnonymousInactiveOctober 29, 2013 at 1:46 pm #42103
I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE YOUR COMING FROM YOU SHOULD JUST LET HIS LOST SELF GO BECAUSE IF HE HASNT LIKE OR LOVED A FEMALE IN 4 YEARS THEN THATS BAD ON HIM CAUSE IT SHOWS HE HAS NO LOVE FOR WOMEN ONLY THE STREETS HE MAYBE ACTING LIKE HE WANT IT SHOWING YOU AND TEASING YOU AT THE SAME TIME THAT HE LIKES YOU BUT THEN PULL A STUNT LIKE THIS GET OVER HIM CAUSE HE’S OVWER YOU AND ON TO THE NEXT STREET GIRL CAUSE THAT’S WHAT HE IS USE TO NOT RELATIONSHIPS US FEMALES WE ALWAYS CAN DO BETTER TRUST ME #lEAVEhIM
babygirlbeth1994ParticipantOctober 29, 2013 at 6:07 pm #42131
I would wait and see if he texts you soon if not id give up.
Newbie22ParticipantNovember 3, 2013 at 1:26 pm #42383
Give it a few more days…if he doesn’t contact you I would try to let it go
david479ParticipantNovember 3, 2013 at 1:42 pm #42385
It sounds like you guys hit it off but I have to agree with NewBie22, if he does not reply in a couple more days move on
darnit666ParticipantNovember 4, 2013 at 10:02 pm #42445
if hes truly interested he wont stop texting
cntrygrl26ParticipantNovember 11, 2013 at 1:25 pm #42675
if he said he couldn’t give you what you wanted, listen.. guys always tell us the truth we just blind side it with our own excuses.
Crystal23ParticipantNovember 14, 2013 at 3:20 pm #42890
It looks like you have received some good advice already. I’m going to second an advice and say call or text him. If he doesn’t respond after a few times, then it is his responsibility to contact you and not the other way around. And perhaps move on to the next guy, if this one wants to be that way.
bimmerqueenParticipantDecember 23, 2013 at 7:33 am #45166
Its always comforting to know you made your last effort. Call him, if he doesn’t answer leave a message. If he doesn’t call back, you know you made your effort, and move on. Your feeling towards this person may be once in a lifetime, but don’t ever lower your worth for someone who doesn’t make the effort.
spikeParticipantDecember 23, 2013 at 3:47 pm #45270
just wait two weeks and start going out with other people…
Ashx88ParticipantDecember 25, 2013 at 1:51 pm #45290
Honestly ? Move on. Why would you willingly jump off a bridge. Ignorance is bliss 🙂
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