Help, I'm into 2 people!

DATING ADVICE FORUM

Help, I'm into 2 people!

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
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    woogs121
    woogs121
    Participant
    April 4, 2019 at 5:02 pm #198199
    Help, I'm into 2 people!

    So a few weeks ago I started seeing Guy 1 who I met through mutual friends. I was not initially attracted to him until we hung out a few more times and I warmed up to his personality more. Things were going in a really good direction, then I left for a 2 week trip. During that trip I ran into Guy 2 (a previous one-time hookup) who lives in another state. We hadn’t talked in maybe a year since we really barely knew each other, but we ended up hanging out for the next 4 days along with some other mutual friends. For the remainder of the trip we texted late into the night, sometimes about very personal topics that I don’t reveal to many other people. My conversations with Guy 1 are not as flirty, but we met up last night to feel things out and I’m still attracted to him. While I love how easy things are with Guy 2 is, I’m scared the distance won’t work. I also see things going well with Guy 1, but I still need to feel things out with him a little more. How do I choose/weigh my options?

    chriscaruso1
    chriscaruso1
    Participant
    April 4, 2019 at 9:45 pm #198204

    In my experience, distance doesn’t work. Long distance is very difficult. It’s a different story if you are dating for a while and then something happens such as college that forces you to be away, but for someone who you don’t completely know yet, it would be hard. If you are equally into the guy that’s closer to you, maybe give him a shot. Maybe confide in him like you did with the other guy and see how he reacts. It’s hard to make a clear decision, but this is ultimately up to you. If you can date someone that you won’t constantly be with in person and you can trust him, then go for it.

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    April 6, 2019 at 3:30 pm #198236

    If you’re not in an exclusive committed relationship you’re entitled to keep your options open.

    Generally speaking long distance relationships are better off left as “flings”.
    Unless there is a realistic plan whereby one person is (willing to relocate) couples usually drift apart.

    The only reason for being in a long distance relationship is because you believe he is “the one”.
    Otherwise if you’re only dating for the fun of it you may as well do that locally.

    Generally speaking when one is given the option of having dessert or vegetables they’ll want dessert.
    However those who have gained wisdom and maturity have learned to be practical and choose what is (best) for them.
    Ideally what you end up with should be a balance of both work and play as it is in life.

    Sometimes making a list of the pros and cons of each person you’re considering can help one decide.
    It’s also important for you to know if you’re looking for something serious long-term or just casual fun.

    alice_smith_seve
    alice_smith_seve
    Participant
    April 25, 2019 at 5:41 am #199144

    distance doesn’t work, or it will work only for couple of weeks…

    jinx2019
    jinx2019
    Participant
    April 25, 2019 at 8:14 am #199145

    Long distance doesn’t work. I believe you should see how things will go with Guy 1. Don’t rush it and try to flirt with him and things will hopefully go well.
    Best of luck.

    jessicaNv
    jessicaNv
    Participant
    May 3, 2019 at 11:50 am #199841

    distance doesn’t work

    0933832
    0933832
    Participant
    May 4, 2019 at 11:09 pm #199867

    Long distance big no no