he's getting uncomfortably obsessive


he's getting uncomfortably obsessive

  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    May 26, 2018 at 4:28 am #175382
    he's getting uncomfortably obsessive

    I’ve dated this guy for a couple of months and I really thought things could work out between us… but they didn’t… so I decided to end things, to which he said no.. he said he’s so in love with me that he can’t get over me even though I told him I don’t like him anymore.. it’s been over a month he hasn’t stopped..
    I tried ignoring him but he keeps calling and texting.. he even showed up in front of my house once..
    the thing is, he is sort of a cousin, so I don’t want him to make a fuzz or tell anyone about us as I don’t want to get into an awkward situation if we ever run into each other in family gatherings

    I want to end things quietly..
    what should I do? ?

    May 26, 2018 at 3:02 pm #175389

    You dated your cousin?

    May 29, 2018 at 10:05 am #175384

    This is the type of thing restraining orders are for. Get in contact with the police. Save all your messages, texts, voicemails, etc. and show them. If your family are understanding they will accept your decision because what he is doing is completely unacceptable. Have you considered what would happen if he gets angry with you? You have to approach this situation with extreme caution.

    May 30, 2018 at 2:05 pm #175643

    First, block his number. It’s easier for you to not have to see all the calls and texts he is sending. I’ve dated a guy like this and its not good for you or him if there is any line of communication between the two of you. Yes, it seems a little mean but in the long run it will help. Having that silence between the two of you will also help him to slowly release his feelings for you. Right now he’s hurting. People do strange dramatic things when they are hurting. I think if he also kept quiet about the two of you dating, then it was mutual. He probably doesn’t want anyone else knowing either. Just keep your distance and cut it off cleanly. Even if you see him at family events, just stick with other people so he can’t get you alone, and if he happens to, just be friendly and tell him there’s nothing to discuss.

    June 17, 2018 at 1:02 pm #177254

    Yes, guys who can’t take no for an answer are a real problem. I second the advice above…..as a male poster. I actually had to address this issue with a male co-worker of mine 6 months ago. I told him that what he was doing wasn’t right and wasn’t going to do anything to get her back. Relationships sometimes don’t work. Sometime it’s no one’s fault. That’s life and you just move on. But making yourself look like a psycho jerk is bad news.

    • This reply was modified 6 days, 15 hours ago by  greenbook.

    June 20, 2018 at 10:25 am #177548

    Be very wary. I agree with the advice of a peace order. He will know you mean business but if you get such an order you yourself cannot reach out to him under any circumstances!

    June 20, 2018 at 7:34 pm #177609

    Protect yourself. Restraining order and blocking his number are good starts.