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Sebastian CobbParticipantJune 29, 2018 at 4:59 pm #178487
Hello, I have two questions I would like to ask, which I will write clearly at the end. First, some background info:
I’ve only had two girlfriends in my life – and that was during high school. I’m now 29 and haven’t had one since.
The thing is, I’m not a bad looking guy, either. I am, however – shy, quiet, and don’t get out much, nor do I approach many women, if at all.
I see beautiful women every day when I’m out doing errands, or going for walks, and I get looks too – but that’s all it ever it is. I’ve heard that women do like/want to be approached – but this varies, depending on the setting you are in. I’ve heard coffee shops are decent places.
The other problem I realized that I have, is that I’m too generic with my conversation, like: “Hey how’s it going? Did you see that movie? Yeah, I like music too.” Apparently, lots of guys are like that, too.
So! My questions are:
1. Where are good places to meet women, and;
2. How can I change up my conversation to be more interesting?
Sebastian CobbParticipantJune 29, 2018 at 5:02 pm #178488
Additional details: I haven’t had any success with online dating, at all, in the 10 years I’ve used it. I don’t want to use it anymore. I’d much rather meet people the “old fashioned” way. It feels more genuine.
I’ve heard of taking up hobbies or classes, but I mean, what are the odds, realistically, that the right woman would be interested in the dorky old stuff that I am and show up at a class, or something?
dashingscorpioParticipantJune 30, 2018 at 12:10 pm #178513
How (and where) can I start approaching attractive women?
Generally speaking most (young) “attractive women” are attracted to three types of men.
1. Hot looking/Attractive Guys
2. Successful Men With Money who are admired by other men
3. “Bad Boys”, Guys with a cool “Swagger” or confidence bordering on arrogance.
Confidence comes with having one success after another. It’s not something one can snap their fingers and get instantly.
You might want to practice by going out with women who don’t intimidate you and then work yourself up to the “attractive ones”.
Another possibility is to pursue older women in their mid 30s -40s who aren’t chasing the fairytale and not playing games.
The more women you date, have sex with, spend time with the more confident you’ll become. Baby steps!
As for online dating for 10 years with no luck that means you were 19. The problem is either you/your profile or the site.
IloveCatsParticipantJuly 1, 2018 at 1:08 am #178519
A woman being attractive is not a reason to approach her and you shouldn’t and don’t have to be attractive for someone to approach you.
Arcann85ParticipantJuly 1, 2018 at 8:08 pm #178535
Im actually kind of in question of this as well. There are many times I see girls while out and about but not sure if I should attempt to approach or converse with her with respect in mind given that I am a total stranger that she has never met before and the possibility of scaring her, annoying her (especially if she’s busy) or coming off like a stalker. Not sure what really IS a good way to approach or meet women. I don’t drink and I really don’t want a woman that frequents bars and clubs. I’m into intelligent women but also physically fit women. Physically, I have a major dental issue as well (going to cost over $100k to resolve) and that fear also makes me concerned as to how women may see it. Career, Car and House wise, I’m decent and am still improving…but not sure where to start.
ShannonSharifTaylorParticipantJuly 27, 2018 at 5:25 pm #180406
I’ve been in this situation before many years ago. But after a lot internal change I was able to overcome this roadblock. I understand what it’s like to be in this situation as well as get out of it. So if you’re open to getting some coaching, I can help you get through not only this situation, but your future situations when it comes to women. Just reach out to me, and I can help any and everyone.
jt7ParticipantJuly 27, 2018 at 5:32 pm #180408
Don’t get down on yourself! You’ve already listed places to meet girls. In my personal experience, girls notice guys who tend to have friends everywhere. Start talking to everyone, and build a relationship up with a favorite cashier, barista, or whatever. It’s great practice – and of course it’s never bad to have extra friends around, it also tends to impress. Women tend to not really respond to the “hey hows it going” approach, unless you know them. It’s better to comment on something like “wow this line is long” etc – something non threatening yet relevant. From there, introduce yourself and see how they respond. Literally go out, and approach as many women as you can (without being a player) and just practice.
As for conversations, ask about them. Talk about their passions and hopes and dreams, reveal something personal about yourself that “you dont normally tell anyone”. People can talk for AGES about their passions/interests.
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