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MaeflowerParticipantFebruary 9, 2018 at 2:57 am #165085
There’s this guy I know through a scholarship and we go to the same university but it is a large university and chances of running into each other on campus are slim to none (seriously we’ve been here for 6 months and only one time I ran into him by chance). We Snapchat a little but we haven’t really had a proper talk. We are friends technically and now have a lot of mutual friends who don’t go to this university but in terms of campus life our lives hardly intersect. What I want to know is how do I get him talking and build up a proper friendship with him that could possibly become something more? (I don’t know for sure if that’s where I want it to go but it crosses my mind). Most of our communication would be over Snapchat and the odd time we have group hang outs. What do I say? How do I make good interesting conversation? I’ve always been terrible at this.
missmarisParticipantFebruary 14, 2018 at 12:29 am #165511
When you chat why don’t you make a time to meet. That would be a good indicator if he was keen too. If he wants to see you he will make the time. Maybe ask to meet up. It will give motivation for the both of you if you commit to a time and date. Snapchat isn’t really going to take you anywhere. When you do have group hang outs why don’t you get him alone for a moment and ask him to catch up?
TiadavisParticipantFebruary 21, 2018 at 11:56 am #166118
when you get a chance to talk to him, get his social media details and start talking to him!
bertParticipantFebruary 21, 2018 at 5:31 pm #166165
you should ask him if he wants to grab some coffee. that way there’s no pressure and it doesn’t have to be an official “date.” You can talk and get to know each other
aadderParticipantFebruary 22, 2018 at 3:25 am #166173
This may not be great advice given that you’re identifying as a woman and I tend not to, so bear in mind the societal ramifications we face are different for this sort of thing. But anyways, I always support being direct if not stating the whole story. If you want to spend more time with him to develop a friendship, you might just want to tell him that directly. You don’t have to say it’s because you want to see if it will go somewhere, but if you put some impetus on him by letting him know, it’s a lot more likely to happen. Or if it’s not, you’ll know right away and won’t regret spending time and energy worrying. And this definitely isn’t one of those things where asking too early will scare someone off, you’d just be asking to hang out, that’s easy and low-pressure. And if he does say he doesn’t want to, there you go, it was never going to happen because if he can’t put in any effort on that end, he was never going to.
- This reply was modified 6 months ago by aadder.
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