How to ease into this

DATING ADVICE FORUM

How to ease into this

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
    December 12, 2018 at 12:50 am FORUM ANNOUNCEMENT

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    aadder
    aadder
    Participant
    February 22, 2018 at 3:31 am #166175
    How to ease into this

    I’m a nominally-straight cis guy, and I’ve never really been into guys, but off and on recently I’ve been really wanting to be intimate with another guy. It just scares me a lot and I’m not handling it well. Not because I have some sort of “oh no ew the Gays” mentality about it, but because I feel like I have zero handle on this. My brain has such a very narrow focus on what I find attractive in guys, I don’t know how to express that without seeming like a huge asshole, I don’t know how to talk to people without being out as bi (or hetflexible, what-have-you), I don’t know how to approach this without gathering a whole bunch of new attention I don’t want both from gay guys and people that want to “help”. It’s all very scary and weird and I’m just freaking paranoid about everything.

    aadder
    aadder
    Participant
    February 23, 2018 at 8:07 pm #166389

    Wow. Okay so apparently when you log on to random websites at 3:30 in the morning you’re not the best at writing. This is… really offensive in ways I totally didnt’ intend now that I’m looking at it, and I apologize to anyone who saw this and was offended. Looking at the way I phrased this, this comes off as the most shallow, bullshit whiny piece of shit thing, and I seriously apologize for my very, very poor phrasing. Jesus Christ.

    aadder
    aadder
    Participant
    February 23, 2018 at 8:10 pm #166390

    So yeah…. I didn’t mean to make it sound like I’m trying to avoid attention from people I’m not interested in, I meant to convey that I’m scared about getting ANY attention, because I don’t want it and arent’ sure how to handle it. I’m not being mad at people that are trying to genuinely help, just that people can tend to be shitty at understanding nuance and I’m scared of talking to people candidly. I didn’t mean to have a super gung-ho attitude that implied an assertion that there are only gay and straight people out there, because that’s nonsense also. Please let me know if I said anything else stupid, because holy damn.

    aadder
    aadder
    Participant
    February 23, 2018 at 8:10 pm #166391

    I seriously would like help, I’m scared and confused, and I really hate how shitty I came off by writing this when I was absolutely not focused.