DatingAdvice Forum | I really like him, but is he playing me? He probably won't contact me again now?

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lisajenks8

Participant

November 6, 2014 at 7:37 pm #67154

I really like him, but is he playing me? He probably won't contact me again now?

So there is this guy friend i have that i have known about 5 years now, and we both had crushes on each other at the beginning that we both admitted, but a relationship never developed and nothing ever happened between us and we lost touch. We got in touch again recently, and he was flirting with me via text, being suggestive, and he told me he wanted me and we have always had a connection. I took it he meant he wanted me in every way. Anyway, i told him my feelings about him, and he just basically said he liked me as a friend and our friendship too much and that was one of a few reasons he couldn’t see us ending up together, but he is sexually attracted to me. To be honest i found the whole too good a friend thing a lame excuse and an easy way to let me down, but he does know i have no intentions of just meeting up for sex, i have made that very clear, but he says he still wants to hang out with me as friends. Does this sound like a brush off? He hasn’t contacted me since

lisajenks8

Participant

November 6, 2014 at 7:39 pm #67155

I would like to add it has only been 2 days though since the last contact, but i already miss talking to him. He hasn’t unfriended me on fb but i know some people don’t really think about that stuff. I guess i am just holding out for some hope in this

Matchmaker3

Participant

November 7, 2014 at 11:07 am #67173

Hi Lisajenks8,
This is quite a tricky situation and it must be quite confusing for you.
The main reason is that men and women communicate differently. When he said “I want you’, it does not mean ‘I love you’ or ‘I want to be with you’. It really means ‘I want to have sex with you’. He does not want anything else than sex and friendship (sex buddy or friend with benefits). I think you got this. At least, apart from the lame excuse, he has been honest with you and you know very clearly his intentions towards you, even though it is heartbreaking for you.
So well done for being strong and stand your ground about the sex thing! It is not always easy, especially with someone you like but you are absolutely right not to have sex just for the sake of it.
This guy is clearly interested in only one thing; Even after 5 years, he will probably never make the move you want. The only move he managed to make was sexual. Your job is not to change him or hope that things will change. Your job is to leave and look for someone worthy of your love.
Best of luck!
Matchmaker3

That one ghost

Participant

November 7, 2014 at 10:01 pm #67235

big sos, just trying to comment to make a tread… dont hate me X(

Opel

Participant

November 7, 2014 at 11:43 pm #67239

He was honest. He wants to be close friends

SupremePickUp

Participant

November 8, 2014 at 4:09 am #67240

wants to be close friends…

likeaknife

Participant

November 8, 2014 at 7:20 pm #67261

he was MAN enough to tell you he’s after sex with you.
if ure not the type, cut it.

gianna3

Participant

November 9, 2014 at 2:40 am #67269

He just doesn’t want a relationship. It seems like he only wants the benefits of one but he doesn’t want to commit yet. Don’t stress over if he will contact you because he will if he misses you. Just hold off a little and don’t contact him first. If he doesn’t talk to you then just cut him off because you’ll be better off and you’ll find a good guy who wants to be with you for the right reasons. You’ll find someone who’s worth being with and you’ll be happy(:

rampaige

Participant

November 9, 2014 at 11:54 am #67273

It may be better to just move on

geekgoddess_84

Participant

November 9, 2014 at 9:30 pm #67293

Reply To: I really like him, but is he playing me? He probably won't contact me again now?

I think if he mentioned having sex and then said he’s fine with just being friends, he’s probably brushing you off. He didn’t get what he wanted from you, so he’s probably over it.