Ignored after the third date!

DATING ADVICE FORUM

Ignored after the third date!

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
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    Nickf
    Nickf
    Participant
    June 1, 2015 at 7:48 pm #79964
    Ignored after the third date!

    Hey everyone,

    Im 27 and new to online dating. I’ve also just started dating again after a few years of being single. I had a third date with a girl and it seemed to go alright in my eyes. So far we’ve only kissed. We sent a few texts back and forth after the date but shes completely ignored my last two texts for 5 days now. I realize there is a good chance this means shes not interested but is this normal in online dating for someone to completely cut you off when they are not interested? or did i probably do something to upset her?

    Should i send her another text?, I would really love to get some kind of closure on this instead of wondering. Sort of just feels like i’ve been tossed aside like something when you’re window shopping!

    JeffS
    JeffS
    Participant
    June 2, 2015 at 10:29 pm #80043

    The last 2 women that I went on 4 dates with did this to me. I would like closure but there is nothing you can say to make her more likely to respond but perhaps this perspective will help you: Respect is a two way street. Anyone who treats people that way and can’t even send a text that would take one minute isn’t worth my time or deserve my respect. It won’t have worked out.

    Anna92
    Anna92
    Participant
    June 3, 2015 at 11:51 am #80067

    This is pretty normal I’d say. You met online, meaning it is much easier for her to cut you off without explanation, since you have no other connection to her life. The threshold for shitty behavior is just lower on the web it seems, you’re more detached and don’t have to face the consequences of your actions. You probably didn’t do anything wrong, sometimes people just lose interest. You could try laying low for a while and see if she contacts you (maybe she just got a bit overwhelmed or stressed and wanted to tune out for a bit) but ask yourself if she’s worth it. Wouldn’t you rather date someone who was really interested in you?

    marcelac
    marcelac
    Participant
    June 3, 2015 at 4:05 pm #80111

    What was your last text to her? If it’s something like “hey what’s up”… some times girls don’t reply to those 🙁

    I would send her one last text after no response for 5 days just saying something like “hey haven’t chat for a while, hope you are having a good week. Do you want to grab a drink this weekend? let me know.”

    See if she replies. If she doesn’t even bother respond as a mature person, she’s not worth your time.

    nerratee
    nerratee
    Participant
    June 4, 2015 at 10:11 am #80143

    Have you tried giving her a call? I’m learning slowly but surely that not everyone is into texting. Especially when it’s a conversation that starts with like a “Hey”

    EthanW
    EthanW
    Participant
    May 23, 2018 at 10:45 pm #175106

    It happens to the best of us man! Stay strong!

    TheGuy
    TheGuy
    Participant
    June 3, 2018 at 3:07 am #175978

    happen to us, try again, never give up, just keep doing it, A you will get better at talking to women and you will meet the one sooner or later.

    also if she dosen’t respond to you she not worth the effort.

    but get out of the game

    bigbyw
    bigbyw
    Participant
    June 3, 2018 at 8:12 pm #176012

    Its worth contacting her once more but if she doesn’t respond then I would move on, you don’t want to come across as needy or desperate and it takes two to make the relationship work.

    MysteryWoman
    MysteryWoman
    Participant
    June 4, 2018 at 11:43 pm #176195

    I would say she is no longer interested or emotionally crippled and not able to sustain or create a relationship with someone. It’s hard to understand this when it’s happening to you, but the way a person treats you says more about them then about you.

    I wouldn’t send her anymore messages. If you felt you must send her another message and want final closure knowing you tried your best, you could say, “I haven’t received a response from you, so I am going assume you are no longer interested in maintaining contact. Best of luck to you!” That’s very classy, but she’s not classy and not deserving of such a message. I’m just giving you an example of what to do should this happen again with another woman. I think most people are cowards and don’t have the guts to treat others properly. It’s a shame.

    Firas
    Firas
    Participant
    June 12, 2018 at 12:44 am #176750
    Reply To: Ignored after the third date!

    Leave her and search for a better one

    i would not wait 5 days 2 days is far to enough

    Leave her and search again and make sure you make it clear to the next one if she cant handle communications

    and waiting for an answer from her // she needs to understand that u are waiting for an answer and not just fooling around

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    June 16, 2018 at 11:57 am #177218
    Reply To: Ignored after the third date!

    “is this normal in online dating for someone to completely cut you off when they are not interested?” – YES!

    “Should i send her another text?” – NO!

    “I would really love to get some kind of {closure} on this instead of wondering.” – You weren’t in a relationship!

    Closure is overrated! There’s nothing she could say that would make you feel better about being ghosted.
    Whatever the reason why she moved on could be the same reason why another woman falls madly in love with you.
    In a world with over 7 Billion people rejection just means: NEXT!

    Three dates does not make for a relationship! This is especially true if you met someone online.
    The mistake a lot of (new) online daters make is they overly invest in one person before truly getting to know someone.
    Imagine yourself being a company looking to fill a position. You would interview multiple candidates before settling on one.
    Everyone is entitled to have their own mate selection screening process/must haves list.