I'm so confused this is the biggest mess I've ever been in help!

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I'm so confused this is the biggest mess I've ever been in help!

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
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    Inadream91
    Inadream91
    Participant
    November 21, 2018 at 5:38 am #189676
    I'm so confused this is the biggest mess I've ever been in help!

    So there is this guy, he’s a teacher at my Uni, he’s young I had him and I’ve now graduated his class, he was my teacher. Things started there, he would draw all over my pc, do silly things in class to mess with me and always waited until there was like one person in class. Then it lead to us exchanging outside contact information, I never wanted to contact him, especially knowing I was with someone. I’m now separated from my husband. I would vent back in school about it and my teacher was always had an open ear. We would hang out until the school is closed while he worked on extra stuff just chatting and he would find anything he could do to pick on me. He would turn red and smile, we would even pull jokes on each other (even outside of school not much since we both have lives) I don’t even attend that portion of the school, he still smiles and turns red, heck he even purposely parks next to me. Well the twist came he’s newly engaged. Yet? Nothing has changed. My morals I hadto stop.

    Inadream91
    Inadream91
    Participant
    November 21, 2018 at 5:40 am #189677

    Yet he still continues to flirt with me even when I bring her up to keep a reminder. They have been together for about 6 years. But, I can’t find it in my heart to keep this flirting going. I’ll miss it but I don’t understand why.. Why me.. Why flirt and hurt two girls.

    Inadream91
    Inadream91
    Participant
    November 21, 2018 at 7:16 am #189678

    I could go on about it all, emails and everything and all the flirting and even other students caught on. We chatted a couple times outside of school but I didn’t try to bother him outside of school and I’d get the smiley face and red blushing face saying if course you’re not bothering me. Then red blush and stops what he’s doing. Then hours go by, I’m just hurt for her. I’d still like to be his friend but even still. I’m so broken for her.

    Vektr
    Vektr
    Participant
    November 21, 2018 at 8:22 pm #189681

    If I were you I would switch your conversations with him about his engagement. Talk about her. If he seems genuinely happy, then I would back off. If not, he could either want you as a side fling, or he actually wants you for you. Finding this out will help you to make the next move, in your own hands

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    November 22, 2018 at 5:27 pm #189703

    “I’d still like to be his friend but even still. I’m so broken for her.”
    You haven’t done anything with him and therefore shouldn’t feel “broken” for her.

    What bothers you is you have romantic feelings for her man.
    You also believe you could have him if you wanted him.
    You imagine being (in her shoes) with a man who is behaving the way he does with you.

    Also bear in mind he’s been with her for six years and throughout your flirting he has never made a move on you.
    In addition he became engaged and the odds are (he) was the one who proposed.
    He’s either just having fun enjoying flirting with you or at best sees you as a “side piece”.

    Even though he’s never asked you out on a date, attempted to kiss you, or have sex you sense there’s chemistry.
    Being “friends” is out of the question because you have more than platonic feelings for him.
    If you had absolutely no interest in him or were turned off by him he’d be in your “friend zone”.
    You’d also have no thoughts of her.