Is he not just that into me?

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Is he not just that into me?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
    August 8, 2018 at 2:50 pm FORUM ANNOUNCEMENT

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    Khelly
    Khelly
    Participant
    July 28, 2018 at 7:55 am #180421
    Is he not just that into me?

    I am confused? I want to share my story and would like to hear from your thoughts.

    I met a guy on Tinder and our first date was great, I would say. We exchanged many things about our life and we agreed to meet up again once he came back from his business trip. (He mentioned on very first date that he is not a very much of a texting guy.) The first date went really well, talking for 3 hours straight without even an awkward silence.

    After 2 weeks, he came back and we met again for dinner and dessert. Then we met again on that weekend for movie and dinner for our 3rd date. Things went really well. As he mentioned earlier, he did text really less, but most of the time he started the conversation.

    And we hanged out again for 4th date before he left for his weekend trip with friends. He was pretty sick on that day, so we went to have a dinner close by his place. He video called me and we talked for a bit. He still texted really less and but I felt like he texted even lesser,

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    July 28, 2018 at 3:51 pm #180431

    Tinder’s original claim to fame was it was a “hookup app”.

    Having said that you’ve already had 4 dates with the guy and you said he initiates the conversations.
    I assume (he) has been paying for these dates. You also stated you talked for 3 hours on the first date.
    He video called you as well. What’s missing?

    Thus far you have said the guy takes you out on dates and spends a great deal of time with you.
    Your only gripe is he’s not behaving like some lovesick teenager texting you back and forth all day long.
    Ask yourself why is texting so important to (you)? I’ve always said: “You text people you don’t want to talk to.”.

    Secondly you never mentioned any “romantic sparks” between you on any of these dates.
    You talked for 3 hours on the first date but did he try to kiss you good night?
    Has he made any attempts to make out with you? or Just “hanging out”?
    Do you feel like there’s any passion/romance chemistry between you? Do you suspect he’s seeing other girls?
    After all you’re not a “couple”.

    Perksnmp
    Perksnmp
    Participant
    July 29, 2018 at 5:04 pm #180444

    It sounds like things are going just the way they should in the beginning. Unfortunately, we bring our insecurities into relationships and worry when there isn’t a text when we’d like one or another date when we are ready and waiting. Just be patient and try not to pressure him. Not everyone communicates the same way, especially with texting. Have confidence and enjoy yourself!

    Khelly
    Khelly
    Participant
    July 30, 2018 at 8:21 am #180422

    (Part:2)
    So finally he came back from a trip but texted me a day later to let me know he was back in town and busy. And he said he was travelling again this weekend again. So I asked if he wanted to see me, we can meet up after work. We met again for 5th time and as usual, he asked me if I reached home and so on. Now he is on his business trip again and has not told me when he will be back. And he has not texted me till now for two days.

    I don’t want to start a conversation either as I was the one who started the conversation before he flied. He did not even tell if he was boarding or had arrived there.
    If a guy is interested in you, he would text at least once a day no matter what right?
    Shall I keep silence? And do you think the business trip is a just a made up excuse not to meet up with me again?

    I thought things went well and now I’m confused. The sickest thing is I think I am emotionally attached to this guy since first date. I may sound immature, I know.

    Khelly
    Khelly
    Participant
    July 30, 2018 at 8:21 am #180442

    Thank you for enlightening me. I was emotionally attached him way too much as he appeared to be just my type.
    No, he just hugged me every time we hang out. He has never attempted to make out with me..

    And you are right, we are not a couple.And I should not expect too much and I dont want to appear too needy and clingy.

    The update is finally he came back from a weekend trip but texted me a day later to let me know he was back in town and busy. And he said he was travelling again this weekend again. So I asked if he wanted to see me, we can meet up after work. We met again for 5th time and as usual, he asked me if I reached home and so on. Now he is on his business trip again and has not told me when he will be back. And he has not texted me till now for two days.I don’t want to start a conversation either as I was the one who started the conversation before he flied. He did not even tell if he was boarding or had arrived there.
    And I stay silent and I hope I am doing right thing.

    Khelly
    Khelly
    Participant
    July 30, 2018 at 10:56 am #180467

    @perksnmp, yes..I totally agree with the insecurities part…
    Thank you for the comment and reminding me to be confident!.

    Now I am staying silent as i dont want to appear needy or clingy.

    lktt71
    lktt71
    Participant
    August 9, 2018 at 5:50 pm #181253

    Keep myour options open

    HowHeLoves
    HowHeLoves
    Participant
    August 9, 2018 at 9:01 pm #181257

    he sees to be playing you, turn the tables around make him chase you!!