Is He Pulling Away For Good?


Is He Pulling Away For Good?

  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    July 3, 2017 at 3:45 pm #141273
    Is He Pulling Away For Good?

    I met a guy 2 months ago through a mutual friend. We exchanged numbers and social medias and went on two amazing dates with a lot of laughter and a good connection. I slept with him on the second date but everything felt normal. He then went away on a holiday and with work for around a month in total so we couldn’t see each other, but kept in touch through facebook messenger and snapchat as often as we could.

    He came back last week and we went on our third date – a full day out and then I stayed at his house. We weren’t quite as affectionate as the second date (less kissing and handholding etc) but it still felt flirtatious, just more comfortable. And then things get a bit confusing. He didn’t text me for 2 days after the date so I bit the bullet and text him. Since then, we’ve gone from sending 50-100 messages per day to around 5. He takes hours to open my messages (even though facebook annoyingly tells me he’s online more often) but when he does, he gives me something to reply to…

    July 3, 2017 at 11:16 pm #141279

    this has happened in a similar situation to me as well
    maybe try taking a huge step ?

    July 4, 2017 at 1:50 am #141282

    Unfortunately there comes a time when messages start to drop off, its not feasible to send 50-100 messages a day for the rest of your life. Sometimes this happens earlier in the relationship then we like, but it doesn’t always mean he’s pulling away. Its also important to live your own life, its only been three dates, and though you really like him, he may also need space. I would start to get concerned if he hasn’t responded to you within a week. Sometimes the best thing to do is line up the next date and then let it be until the day prior and checkin to make sure you all good for the date. However, 3rd, 4th and 5th dates are the trickiest. This is when you either want to continue dating someone or not, try not to be needy. Don’t worry we all have done this. Other than that, just chat to him. No one deserves a time waster. If he’s not into you let him go.

    July 4, 2017 at 6:38 am #141290

    I see it like this :
    He had a massive attraction towards you, which connects with the sexual tension as well. Still he started to consider you as a gf material, maybe in the future. You had sex on 2nd date and both enjoyed it so everything was fine. The 3rd date was an exam – how will you both feel around each other after the 3rd date – if there still will be this massive attraction and if you both will feel like continuing.
    The fact that he didn’t text first afterwards means something in my opinion, but I think it’s good you were the one who texted him first this time.
    I think he now has doubts about you and needs some space.
    If you really like him, you should show him you have life besides him. Needyness is the worst thing you can show now – that you just focus now on him and while not texting you’re getting crazy.
    It’s good that he knows you like him. Now take a deep breath, live your life and see what happens

    July 5, 2017 at 11:12 am #141274

    eg he’ll carry on the conversation or change the subject. It’s just odd that i’ve noticed such a change in our texting patterns, from all day every day to just a couple of message exchanges.

    I haven’t bombarded him with texts/snapchats – i only reply to his messages in the way i normally would so he doesn’t feel any pressure from me. I’ve heard about men pulling back at this point in the relationship so i’m trying to give him as much space as he needs, but it’s been a week now and i don’t really understand what’s happening.

    I suppose my question is – if he’s still keeping the conversation going (even if it’s painfully slow) is it likely that he’s still interested and just needs a break to get his head together? Or has he potentially lost interest in me completely? Any advice would be great!