Is she playing games with me or is really uncertain?

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Is she playing games with me or is really uncertain?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
    November 11, 2018 at 5:06 pm FORUM ANNOUNCEMENT

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    Jxabynebk123
    Jxabynebk123
    Participant
    October 24, 2018 at 1:44 am #187795
    Is she playing games with me or is really uncertain?

    So I met this girl online, went on a date, kissed, texting everyday, everything was going well. But then the next time we saw each other, she anounced me when she met me, she met another guy at the same time and she doesn’t know who she will choose and needs time to think about it while preferably continuing seeing us both. At first I was like “meh I need to think about it” then she answered that the other guy sees it as a challenge and asked of I’m teally really sure I want to cancel our second date. I said that maybe there will be a second one but just not now because I wasnt feeling so good about it. So we hugged and said goodbye.
    On my way back I texted her that I wish her the best but that it doesn’t really feel right for me. She then said that we have so much in common in she doesn’t want to lose me, she just can’t choose right now because she had a spark with guy B too. Then I thought about something..(next post)

    Jxabynebk123
    Jxabynebk123
    Participant
    October 24, 2018 at 1:55 am #187796

    …I told her that if she promises that she won’t get mad if I date an other person too, I will live with it. At first she didn’t seem like she really understood what I was talking about but she finally accepted.
    Now, today she seemed soo much more interested than the last few days. She asked me out for about every single day of the week, and we found a day where it fits my schedule, she said she would not show up in class to spend more time with me (I won’t encourage her to do it but I won’t stop her either).
    I also figured out that her story about an other guy has its flaws. When I asked her when they saw each other, she hesitated and threw me a day where I perfectly know she was working all day (we always share our work and school schedules). I also doubt she has time to date two guys since she is also really busy with college and friends, has a job, and when she’s not working or in class she’s almost always texting me on her cellphone so I would know if she was seeing someone.

    Jxabynebk123
    Jxabynebk123
    Participant
    October 24, 2018 at 9:05 am #187797

    Anyway, wanted to read your thoughts on the subject.

    richiro
    richiro
    Participant
    October 25, 2018 at 1:16 pm #187862

    you, without realizing it, did the perfect thing to spark her interest – you didn’t act too interested. you stood your ground. you did NOT reward her for throwing this curve at you and instead inadvertently let her know that – okay.. well, you just risked losing me by doing this. and that was perfect! that’s why she’s so interested now.

    my advice: don’t commit to her. Definitely be open AND date others (hey! she opened that door.. not you). Let her compete for you – not the other way around. you are in the driver’s seat here. BUT, don’t be malicious to her, and don’t ever purposely hurt anybody else (still always treat them the way you’d want to be treated). BUT.. she opened this door. She will now need to prove and constantly prove to you it will never happen again before you commit.

    daddyo5571
    daddyo5571
    Participant
    November 5, 2018 at 3:17 pm #188749

    Richiro is totally correct,but on ther other hand don’t play games with her if you like her and she likes you then you two need to come together and get some sort of understanding.

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    November 5, 2018 at 5:00 pm #188769

    It should go without saying anyone with an active online dating profile is keeping their options open.
    Give her credit for telling you there is another guy in the picture.
    Truth be told she was under no obligation to reveal what she does when she is not with you.
    After all you’ve only met and are not in an exclusive relationship.

    Online dating is very much like posting a want ad and interviewing candidates to fill a position.
    No company would pull down their ad after receiving one resume.
    No job hunter would stop looking for job opportunities after having one interview.
    Until there has been an offer made and accepted both people should keep their options open.

    You did the right thing by telling her you’d be seeing other women.
    Hopefully you stick to that until you both decide the two of you want to be exclusive.
    The biggest mistake many people make is “assuming” they’re in an exclusive relationship!
    Unless you two have “the talk” both of you should continue dating others