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srm1325ParticipantJuly 24, 2015 at 10:44 pm #83221
So my boyfriend is old fashioned. We’ve been dating for 7 months and I’ve only paid for our dates like twice. I feel bad. One of the times I paid he had forgotten his wallet (only $6 for two milkshakes) and the other time my little brother was with us so I paid for us all. When I paid because he forgot his wallet, he said later “it’s not much of a date if the girl pays” at that point we’d dated for 4 or 5 months. I’ve offered to pay but he just smiles and acts like he didn’t hear me. I feel bad but he seems to prefer this. We’re both 18. He has a job and I don’t. I wasn’t allowed to work in high school and was waiting to start college before getting a job for scheduling purposes. We drive my car everywhere using my gas which makes me feel a little better but my dad pays for my gas so it’s really not even me. I feel guilty about it. But he seems to feel he should always pay and doesn’t seem to mind. What do I do?
oomaParticipantJuly 25, 2015 at 1:30 pm #83243
Why don’t you suggest that you could split the bill ,next time you go out? Tell him you appreciate him paying most of the time but it would really make you happy if you both could split the bill. 🙂
hopelessromantic85ParticipantJuly 25, 2015 at 10:56 pm #83258
Let him pay or start doing dates that are inexpensive or free if it makes you feel better. By the way, how sweet is that? Paying for every date that young? Awesome! ?
30somethinggirlParticipantJuly 29, 2015 at 1:02 pm #83420
I always feel that people should contribute to the relationship and there are different ways besides money… Perhaps you could start cooking for him by bringing the ingredients you are contributing financially and with your time. Also perhaps you guys could pay for stuff proportionally to your ability to pay. If he earns 100K and you earn 40K perhaps he pays the lions share but you pick up lunches, treats at a movie, drinks etc.
SktlezParticipantJuly 29, 2015 at 3:13 pm #83429
I don’t feel this is a bad thing at all! You definitely shouldn’t feel bad for him offering to pay. Every girl I’ve ever dated I’ve always paid for them.
proxy83ParticipantJuly 30, 2015 at 11:57 am #83439
I try to always pay, but he should be comfortable if you want to get the tab from time to time.
overthinkerParticipantJuly 30, 2015 at 2:47 pm #83443
letting a man pay lets them feel like they are taking care of you, which is something they want to do, so I would allow him to pay. Next time tell him you appreciate him paying for you and would love to pay from him sometime then see where the conversation goes.
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