Looking for advice/input from single mothers, but all input welcome.


Looking for advice/input from single mothers, but all input welcome.

  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    June 23, 2018 at 6:01 pm #177820
    Looking for advice/input from single mothers, but all input welcome.

    Two month ago I started dating a woman with a 6 year old son. Everything was going well until Monday, she texted she was not ready to start a relationship. Much of the reason appears to be protection of her son and introducing a new man into the scene. I understand, but was taken by surprise being everything was going extremely well. A little info on the dating: We both started on the same page, good careers, level headed. Hit it off really well and had good, regular communication. Lived about an hour form each other and typically spent the night at one of our homes once per week. There was good balance between who intiatted communication, making date decisions, sharing the driving because of distance and sharing the cost. At no point did I feel emotional distance from her or concern about being a rebound. We had long discussion and she sounds open to stay in contact, but needs time.
    My question is how I should proceed, if at all? I do care for her very much.

    June 24, 2018 at 12:48 pm #177825

    You didn’t mention how you met a woman who lives a hour away from you.
    If it was via an online dating site or app there is a good chance her profile remains active and she wants to keep her options open.

    “she texted she was not ready to start a relationship.”
    After two months of dating and spending the night at each other’s house she chose to break the news to you via text.
    I suppose that’s better than being “ghosted”. People (text) people they don’t want to talk to.

    “she sounds open to stay in contact, but {needs time.} She means time away from (you).
    ” Never accept friendship as a “consolation prize”.

    The person doing the dumping is always open to remaining friends to keep from feeling like the “bad guy”.
    The dumped person sees the idea of remaining friends as (hope) for a potential reconciliation.
    Essentially you’ve been “benched” while she frees herself up to date other options. Move on.

    “Never love anyone who treats you like you’re ordinary.” – Oscar Wilde

    June 25, 2018 at 9:56 am #177830

    Had to leave some details out due to the character limit. We did meet on eharmony and her account is no longer active. Like I had mentioned it was going very well and never sensed any signs of something like this happening. Much of it does seem related to her protecting her son, but an incident occurred Monday night that caused her son to become very upset (fathers day). He didn’t understand why the previous boyfriend was not around any longer. Sound like this also opened some wounds for her. It did not completely end over text…we spoke on the phone for quite a while about the situation. Prior to this incident eve occurring we were speaking not the phone the same morning about seeing each other more often. Which she was very excited about…thats why Im left so confused right now. Also why I was hoping for single mom advice or input to get an understanding other their thought process and what I could do, but I do appreciate your input.