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[rubyredgemsParticipant]

December 8, 2015 at 7:59 pm #89762

mixed signals or pretty clear?

I have been in a casual rtshp with a man for 7 months. at first it started off where he would text all the time, and now it has dwindled to an occasional text weekly, if i text (i try to mirror him) i get a response as well, sometimes it takes a while but i know he’s a busy guy (not saying that is an excuse tho). Our hangouts always consist of hanging out as well (dinner, event) and not solely hooking up. But it’s definitely casual because we have not progressed, somtimes go a month or so without seeing each other. It’s not ‘goign anywhere’. I had resolved to let him know that i was interested in more the last time i saw hinm, whcih was two monhts ago, when he instead brought up exclusivity first. was kind of taken by surprise and said ‘what?’ and then he said it again and i said a couple of things and i said ok and he said now what? and then I said let’s talk about this when we get home beause we had to get to the movie and such. (cont’d below)

[rubyredgemsParticipant]

December 8, 2015 at 7:59 pm #89763

and then we didnt talk about it when we got home. i texted him to meet up a couple of days later, to grab a drink, but he was busy and i said ok wanted to finish the convo we started. we’ve both been traveling/busy, but i haven’t seen him in 7 weeks and our texting is the same as before, sporadic and on the hook. i tried to plan a couple of things with him but he’s been busy, although the first time he was out of town, the second time he was busy but tried to make it work. so i guess my question is, why even bring up exclusivity if he’s not going to make an effort or even close out the convo?did he just say it in the moment and then was taken aback by my response and let it go? he knows i want to talk about it more so… i just don’t get the purpose of him saying it? any thoughts? maybe i hurt his feelings, but i am clearly still wanting to see him. we didn’t really meet reg before the convo, so it’s not surprising that he’s not initiating stuff regularly, but not at all? weird?

[rubyredgemsParticipant]

December 10, 2015 at 9:42 am #89875

any thoughts?

[jennlexiiParticipant]

December 10, 2015 at 1:08 pm #89908

i understand he’s busy but maybe you should try moving on if its been months that he hasn’t reached out to you or tried hanging out with you. you may find happiness with someone else

[EmotMessParticipant]

December 12, 2015 at 5:06 am #89985

I agree with the person above.
If he isn’t giving you time then he isn’t worth it. I think you should first tell him how you feel about all this, but at the same time let him know that you understand he is busy.
But even after you discuss things with him, and he shows no change or effort, then I think it’d be time to find someone else :/