NEED A MANS OPINION PLS (so I'm being sneaky and posting here)


NEED A MANS OPINION PLS (so I'm being sneaky and posting here)

  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    June 14, 2015 at 11:16 pm #80877
    NEED A MANS OPINION PLS (so I'm being sneaky and posting here)

    We have known each other for a few years already, but only recently had started talking/texting regularly – every single day for the past six weeks. Even when I know he’s out with friends or busy he still manages to send a message. The other day he suggested we “hang out” and so that Saturday night we made plans to do just that. We went to dinner (he paid) and then for dessert & drinks (I paid) and I felt the conversation was great. He had even mentioned what he would like us to do next time and brought it up again later in the night. I wasn’t sure how to end the evening so I initiated an awkward hug and then he hurriedly just left. I felt like everything went really well until that moment. I sent him a message the next day and we chatted for 5 minutes and that’ it. It’s the least we’ve talked since we started to.

    SO was this even a date? Should I be concerned that his enthusiasm to talk has suddenly just died? Do you guys still wait 3 days if you’ve been talking daily already?

    June 15, 2015 at 12:58 am #80878

    If you were having such an outing with someone you had met recently that would be a very obvious date. Now you say you have known each other for a while so it’s hard to say what it really means for him but even then I don’t think it would unreasonable to call it a date.
    Texting everyday can be exhausting and you may run out of what to say if there no real interaction. I wouldn’t worry about it as of now, see if he asks you out on a second date. If he doesn’t do it nothing prevents to ask him out yourself. If he says yes great, if he says no you have your answer and you might consider moving on.

    June 15, 2015 at 6:04 pm #81027

    I just went thru this. The woman I took out on my boat, when I asked if she just wanted to hang out, later admitted she was not sure it was a date. I did that on purpose, because I was not sure how she would react [she was my customer]. Later, I admitted it was a date because things heated up after that. We actually talked about it and it became very clear.

    June 15, 2015 at 9:31 pm #81028

    Let him breath for a couple of days. If you still have no news after that, he may have changed his mind about what he wanted with you. He is probably asking himself that same question, “was it a date for her?”.

    June 16, 2015 at 3:25 am #81031

    You are probably wondering the same thing that he is wondering. Just be clear with each other.

    June 16, 2015 at 2:13 pm #81110

    I would probably consider it a date. If he wasn’t feeling good about it then he wouldn’t have suggested what y’all can do next time and he wouldn’t have chatted with you afterwards. I would just not reach out to him first next time and that’ll let you know. He is probably just busy and doesn’t have a lot of time right now.

    June 17, 2015 at 9:17 am #81160

    The is the problem when people do not communicate clearly. A misty area of uncertainty lingers around. Both of you think one thing – possible the same thing about the event but actions indicate something different. Maybe your sudden end of night hug was a mistaken ( to him ) signal that you wanted a sexual ending to the evening which he was not prepared for. Some guys like to get to know a lady first before jumping into bed with them! contrary to public perception. Sit him down and have a heart to heart talk with him about the at evening out and both of you spell out exactly what your looking for in each other, friendship, lovers, dating whatever. Communication is a great tool – use it!

    June 17, 2015 at 10:43 pm #81286