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AnonymousApril 11, 2017 at 11:53 am #132848
Dating a guy that’s lived here for 4 years – we met about a year ago because we share the same past time & go to an event that happens once a week to hangout w/ all of our friends. We started dating about 3 weeks ago & have hung out almost every day except for a few days, including me staying the night almost every time. He says where he’s from they don’t really get the whole “personal space” concept and he doesn’t really think it’s important to have that since he didn’t grow up like that. We both seem to have the same understanding that we’re both clingy and mature individuals that don’t want to f*ck up any kind of relationship that would affect our past time hobby. But as an American dating someone who’s not, I’m still a little concerned even though I REALLY like him. I have a lot of free time to see him right now, but that will change here in about a month, so I won’t be able to see him very often around that time anyways. It is too much even though we’ve been good friends for a year?
omada22ParticipantApril 13, 2017 at 9:42 am #133105
Personal space is one of the most important things…
richiroParticipantApril 13, 2017 at 2:11 pm #133166
depends on who you ask. as with most things – there is not one universal that everybody agrees to. So.. the REAL question is. is it important to you? is it important to him? Based on that is there a way that works for both of you or not?
When oy talk about preferences, personal feelings, etc. – it always comes down to what each person involved believes and thinks. There is never 1 answer that fits all.
RWnParticipantApril 16, 2017 at 7:42 pm #133396
It’s a tricky one: the infatuation that comes with the beginning of a relationship is so irresistable often that you write it off although you have a sneaking suspicion you shouldn’t, and simply tell yourself: ‘pah, personal space is for people less in love than we are’.
I remember my last relationship started in such a whirlwind. We lived on top of each other. We did EVERYTHING together. We lost touch with friends, and became so totally consumed in the relationship that the outside world as I had known it as a single girl seemed to virtually cease to exist. It was all wonderful for a while of course, but looking back at it, totally unhealthy.
Most people need time to spend with themselves. We shouldn’t be afraid of being alone. It is, in my opinion, one of the most centering, healthy things we can do, in the right amounts. It gives us a sense of who we are, what we want from life, what we are looking for. Personal space and personal friendships are sacred in a relationship!
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