Player or just flirty?

DATING ADVICE FORUM

Player or just flirty?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
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    ElisabethTheGreat
    ElisabethTheGreat
    Participant
    December 4, 2018 at 1:31 pm #190487
    Player or just flirty?

    We started to chat online dating app some 2 weeks ago, clicked asap. At start he was very flirty and light, classical Sag man. But since we moved to WhatsApp he started to be more serious, thoughtful and personal. We do want to meet soon,but 90 miles in between us and both of our jobs are clashing at time, Xmas time and our bdays šŸ˜
    I was talking with a friend that got me on this app, and in chat found out we talk with same man. Which is fine, I’m also chatting with different persons. My issue is, that with her, he’s different, rauchy and very sexual. Not much in to personal, just plain carnal.

    Which one could be real him?
    Both? None? Just a player

    richiro
    richiro
    Participant
    December 5, 2018 at 6:25 pm #190560

    how long has he been talking to each of you?

    i would say the lower common denominator is the “real him”.
    but it also might be that he’s able to relate to a lot of different types. I am that way. Taht is because i got moved to different schools and neighborhods on average every 2 yrs when i was growing up. I grew up in a small town (so a redneck town) but then wen tto a private school in the city where the richest went, but bordered on the poorest section of the city. So just in that i had experience and met and made friends with small town rednecks, big city urban types, both extremely right, and then extremely poor underprivileged people.

    i later joined college student groups and took a women studies class (i am a male).. but enrolled and graduated with a business school degree. so in there i was exposed and spent time with academic types, women’s studies types, different ethnicities, and then conservative money-related people in business school.

    so i relate to many types.

    gigi
    gigi
    Participant
    December 5, 2018 at 8:07 pm #190562

    People can change personalities when they’re talking to different people, I’m like that too. With someone who I’m close with I’m a lot more crazy and out going while with someone else I’m way more polite and introverted. Maybe he’s more raunchy with your friend because he thinks she’s into that.

    ElisabethTheGreat
    ElisabethTheGreat
    Participant
    December 6, 2018 at 2:26 am #190566

    Well, she is very aggressive in approach to men, the way she talks to them. Guess this thing is finished. As he stoped answering her. When we were last night talking about bad online dating experiences, he gave her, or someone very similar to her as example.
    I don’t have much experience in online dating, well, in dating all together. I’m 24, he’s 7years older, and had relationship with my high school Bea. So it may come out as inexperienced.
    It is what it is, Saturday is date night šŸ˜

    kayak2133
    kayak2133
    Participant
    December 6, 2018 at 5:22 pm #190648

    He is probably trying to be appealing to both of you and is saying things based off your personality.

    H0pEfulR0mAntic
    H0pEfulR0mAntic
    Participant
    December 23, 2018 at 12:33 am #191629

    Chances are he responds to different women in ways specific to their individual needs. Some women might more clearly express their desires at the start of a new online fling. This does not define the man as either a player or flirtatious. He is looking for the right kind of mate. People tend to feel more comfortable around people that reciprocate their own carnal desires. Perhaps make an effort to show this man your naughtier side and see who he gives more of his attention to. There’s so much competition for men and women in the dating app age. If you think he could be more player than anything else, you can always use an online service like Global Max Search or the many others just like it to find out just how many dating accounts he has. Knowing is half the battle, right? I’d say the guy really just wants to find a match worthy of his time. His brain is telling him to be dirtier with her because deep down he doesn’t want to scare you off. Go with the flow if you really wanna know.

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    December 26, 2018 at 10:17 am #191687

    You said: ” Iā€™m also chatting with different persons.”
    Would you say that makes you flirty? a player?
    Probably not.

    When people meet online it should be expected they’re keeping their options open.
    After all they are not in an “exclusive relationship” with anyone.

    Everyone has more than one side to their personality and we don’t treat everyone the same either.
    A lot of how we behave depends on the other person’s personality and how receptive they are.
    Your friend may come off as being more flirty and open to sexual innuendo than you.

    Whether you meet him or not it’s important for you not to put all of your eggs in one basket at this time.
    It’s a mistake to become {emotionally invested} in anyone before there is an established relationship.
    This is especially true in a long distance situation where you know the other person is engaged with others.
    Keep your options open and hopefully you’ll meet someone who is local.