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john8345ParticipantSeptember 22, 2014 at 8:44 pm #62404
Male, divorced, and over 45. After the divorce I was contacted by an old friend that wanted to help me get over the divorce. We’ve been talking for over a month and I’m interested in her. I’m going to visit her soon (lives out of town). She knows I’m looking locally for a date. Haven’t seen her in years, photos and conversation are great.
I’ve also found a local lady that I’ve just begun a relationship with (3 dates). She is unaware of the other lady and she’s told me that she’s happy seeing me. Made no commitments.
I think the lady for me is the old friend and I want each of us to find out for sure when I see her. The local lady and I are enjoying our time together so far and I could easily see things continuing with her
Want to do the right thing
Do I tell the local lady about someone that I’m going to visit before I go? OR
Do I wait to see how things go with out of town lady and if it’s good, stop seeing local lady, if out of town lady is not for me I still have local lady.
solitary81ParticipantSeptember 24, 2014 at 9:43 am #62464
I think you should ‘wait to see how things go with out of town’.
I was in the same situation. My ex and I broke up so I put myself on the market. And boy was I fishin’… I courted a doctor, a baker and a nurse. They were all equally unique in making me happy, but it was an emotional gamble. I narrowed it down to the baker (childhood friend) and the nurse, I chose the baker which I may add was the worse mistake of my life. I don’t think the baker was in love with me but infatuated with the man I was 15 years ago. My point is wait see how it goes and in time see where it leads, the nurse was the right decision and it sucks seeing her with another man and I’m alone writing this message.
john8345ParticipantSeptember 24, 2014 at 5:56 pm #62500
Thanks solitary81 for your honest and perhaps, tough to say reply. I appreciate your honesty and advice. I guess you were dating 3 at a time. I’m sorry that your situation worked out with you being alone. Hopefully you’re getting back out there and looking for someone to see. I certainly know about choosing the wrong one.
I’m sure I would feel terrible if I told local gal and then she was later with someone else and my out of town gal (whom I haven’t seen yet) didn’t work out. Local gal and I are going out again this weekend so I would want to tell her tonight if I was going to tell her before I go see out of town gal.
On the plus side, out of town gal and I are taking a lot of time to learn about each other BEFORE we actually see each other. I think that’s great for a possible beginning relationship.
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