Problems with girl, Need advice please.

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Problems with girl, Need advice please.

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
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    Strikablade
    Strikablade
    Participant
    April 17, 2020 at 11:23 am #232912
    Problems with girl, Need advice please.

    Im in a complcated relationship with this girl, She has bad depression atm and suffers anxiety. Been friends for 6 years, we dated last year for about 4 months and the reason we stopped was because she kindly asked me if we could pause our relationship for a while. The reason she asked was because she was getting very down and depressed and didnt want to drag me down so she thought it was best to pause our relationship till she could get herself better again. I was against it at first but when she explained it to me, i thought i was being supportive by agreeing to it. Anyways nothing changed between us at all except for the label of dating and the extra pressure and things were going great for the next 5 months. Few months ago she lost her job and she has been getting worse depression, about a month ago i started noticing some weird out of character things, Like vanishing for hours and giving really bad reasons as to why she vanished and was really snappy with me. (continue comments)

    Strikablade
    Strikablade
    Participant
    April 17, 2020 at 11:36 am #232913

    Short story, I found out she was hanging with this guy who was 20 years her senior. I caught her out multiple occasions and she flat out lied to me about it until i witnessed her get dropped off by this guy at her house. I brought it up and took her half a day to admit that she was hanging with him cause he’s depressed like her and didnt want to tell me cause i get jealous and annoyed and weird and stuff when she hangs with guys or talks to them. I accepted what she said, she said nothing was going on, i believed her, all i asked is that she tell me in furutre when she goes to see him. About 5 days later, i find her car at his place for about 2 hours, she gets home and lies about where she had been, when i asked her about seeing her car there, she said oh i forgot, i just dropped some stuff off. Next night i went for walk and saw her car there again, so i waited outside for 30 mins to see what they would do. I saw her give him a hug, a pretty big one. I snapped and had a panic attack

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    April 17, 2020 at 1:10 pm #232925

    “She has bad depression atm and suffers anxiety.”

    “..she…asked me if we could pause our relationship for a while.”

    “..i started noticing some weird out of character things, Like {vanishing} for hours…”

    “I found out she was {hanging with this guy} who was 20 years her senior.”

    “..she flat out lied to me about it”

    “took her half a day to admit that she was hanging with him cause he’s depressed like her..”

    “i waited outside for 30 mins to see what they would do. I saw her give him a hug, a pretty big one.”

    “I snapped and had a panic attack.”

    Based upon what you’ve written the two of you are NOT in a relationship anymore!

    In order for (her) to be “the one” (she) would have to see (you) as being “the one”
    At the very least a “soulmate” is someone who actually wants to be with you!

    In a world with over 7 Billion people why are you obsessed with someone {who is a Liar and has Mental Problems?}
    You can do better than this! Love YOURSELF enough to move on!

    Strikablade
    Strikablade
    Participant
    April 20, 2020 at 8:55 am #232914

    She got home and said her phone was playing up thats why she hadnt repled to me all day, i blew up at her and told her what i had saw and that i was sure she was cheating on me, and she lied to me and just got up her quite bad. We sort of talked it out next day, she exclaimed that he was just super upset so she gave him that hug. She wreckons she didn’t lie about anything and now about a week later, she is blaming me for hurting her and stalking her and basically everything being my fault. I admitted and took blame for what i did, and ill make it up to her for basically stalking his place. But i feel like shes in denial about her part to play in all this, She thinks that the signs i was getting were all wrong and dont exist and that i had no justification for thinking that there was something going on and she thinks she hasnt lied at all. Im trying to make up for what i did, but she doesnt seem to want to or even try see from my point of view. What’s your thoughts?