She told me how much she liked me, then she flaked on me twice. What do I do?

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She told me how much she liked me, then she flaked on me twice. What do I do?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
    November 11, 2018 at 5:04 pm FORUM ANNOUNCEMENT

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    tallmansam92
    tallmansam92
    Participant
    November 4, 2018 at 4:02 pm #188705
    She told me how much she liked me, then she flaked on me twice. What do I do?

    Met a girl at work a few months back. We had an instant connection. She was going through some relationship troubles with her fiancé and I could relate so became a shoulder to cry on.

    Anyway, she took her ring off whilst she made a decision about whether to stay with him. She hadn’t told her friends or family at this point to save embarrassment.

    One weekend, she went on her Bachelorette, got very drunk and called me telling me how much she liked me. I didn’t say the same, but that was how I felt too.

    Go into work the next week to find out she’s got her ring back on and the wedding is back on. I lost it a bit and told her I couldn’t be around her anymore.

    Kept that up for two months until she calls me crying and saying it’s officially now over with her fiancé.

    I’ll finish this in the first answer 👍

    tallmansam92
    tallmansam92
    Participant
    November 4, 2018 at 4:02 pm #188706

    So slowly we’ve started talking again. It was good until last week when she asked if I want to hang out with her at the weekend. I said yes and we agreed to go shopping and out for dinner together.

    On the day she ignores my texts.

    She apologises on the Monday and says let’s do something next week. We agree she will come round mine on Saturday, I’ll cook dinner and we will watch a movie together.

    On the day she ignores my messages until 7pm and says shes had a busy day. No apology for bailing.

    Now I don’t know what to do. She’s the one making the plans, telling me she likes me, yet she’s the one bailing every week!

    Do I give up, or do I persist? And what should I say to her at work tomorrow?

    choatic_c
    choatic_c
    Participant
    November 4, 2018 at 5:18 pm #188708

    I can’t say what her issue is but I had a friend who was a shoulder to cry on ( me and my significant other just broke up recently and I had this conversation with this friend today) I realized that I was flirting with him and him with me because I wanted the attention but it didn’t help once I laid in bed alone. I also realized that he was hopeful for something to happen and I realized that was unfair to him so I basically sent him a dear john and he wasn’t too happy about it but it felt cleaner. She probably wants the comfort of having a back up or she could actually be busy either way you have to have this conversation with her.

    silentwind
    silentwind
    Participant
    November 5, 2018 at 10:27 am #188728

    life just sucks sometimes, it happens, just cop with it, you will find the one

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    November 5, 2018 at 6:11 pm #188775

    Stop putting your life on hold! Get out and start dating other women.
    You need a woman who actually WANTS to be with YOU.

    This girl is treating you like you’re on a team riding the bench.
    She only calls you in the game when the “starter” is in foul trouble.

    You’re clearly not a priority in her life. You’re the “backup plan”.
    There also is the possibility she has decided to put you in the “friend zone”.

    “Never love anyone who treats you like you’re ordinary.” – Oscar Wilde