Should I Be Sorry?

DATING ADVICE FORUM

Should I Be Sorry?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
    October 10, 2018 at 4:22 am FORUM ANNOUNCEMENT

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    Jeremy23422
    Jeremy23422
    Participant
    December 20, 2017 at 10:43 am #160568
    Should I Be Sorry?

    I broke up w/my ex about 6 mo. ago (by default, when she moved out and I neglected to pursue communication with her) and am in a new relationship that is 1,000x more functional, with the girl of my dreams. We’re both very happy and will likely marry at some point. I don’t miss my ex at all, because she was abusive, using and manipulative – a sociopath. And our relationship had become a total zero. But it bothers me a bit that of the relationships I’ve had, 2 exes have blocked me on social media. The last one unfriended me on FB, then blocked me, then figured out who my current gf is and blocked her! I was a little creeped out by that. I am guessing she probably blocked my phone # as well.

    The message that i’ve gotten from both exes’ actions is that they were heartbroken over the breakups. I don’t miss either enough to want to see or talk to them again (let alone reestablish a relationship) -especially the last one, who is an ass – but I am sorry i hurt these women. Is that wrong?

    Jautis
    Jautis
    Participant
    December 20, 2017 at 2:47 pm #160605

    Well it’s good you feel sorry for hurting them, but you didn’t do anything wrong. You’re not obligated to be in a relationship with someone no matter how much it will hurt them later.

    Jeremy23422
    Jeremy23422
    Participant
    December 20, 2017 at 9:37 pm #160642

    No, I realize there is no obligation and I don’t feel one. Christ, it would be masochism to go back to my ex. And when I came face to face with what a loser she is, the attraction went out the window.

    I guess what I keep coming back to is that one of the unwritten rules of dating (part of the unspoken treaty) involves the constant risk of being hurt. Maybe entering into a relationship means implicitly accepting that risk.

    Djsouthboi79
    Djsouthboi79
    Participant
    December 21, 2017 at 8:07 pm #160790

    Blocking and unfriending someone in social media is an immature act. Knowing that they haven’t unblocked you means they haven’t getting over you.

    SteveyP129
    SteveyP129
    Participant
    December 22, 2017 at 7:57 pm #160893

    You did nothing wrong

    Jeremy23422
    Jeremy23422
    Participant
    December 23, 2017 at 8:13 am #160908

    Thanks for the encouraging words, all.

    obrady9
    obrady9
    Participant
    December 26, 2017 at 1:49 pm #160902

    Wemon block men on social media as a way to break a soul tie and to move on.the question is if you don’t care anymore why do you know about it. It sounds like you’ve got some issues you need to sort out personally and deal with at the core.

    Jeremy23422
    Jeremy23422
    Participant
    December 26, 2017 at 10:48 pm #161030

    Nope, no issues here obrady. I would acknowledge it if I missed either ex, and I don’t.

    I just don’t like the rule of the dating contract that means someone will inevitably get hurt, but I feel better about it when I start to think about what the most recent one put me through.

    Throwaway359
    Throwaway359
    Participant
    December 27, 2017 at 6:39 pm #161060

    you didn’t do anything wrong, it was simply beyond your control

    jackkilt
    jackkilt
    Participant
    December 27, 2017 at 8:55 pm #161062
    Reply To: Should I Be Sorry?

    You’re good, dont be sorry. Focus on moving forward and yourself

    chiefs23
    chiefs23
    Participant
    December 28, 2017 at 8:33 pm #161080
    Reply To: Should I Be Sorry?

    Obviously dont feel sorry for you most recent ex because of the way she treated you. Dont feel sorry for any other girl youve broken up with either. Focusing on the past is a waste of your time, especially in situations like this, where you know youre better off now.