Should I try again?

DATING ADVICE FORUM

Should I try again?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
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    colinwall87
    colinwall87
    Participant
    July 2, 2019 at 11:35 pm #203219
    Should I try again?

    I met this girl that was on a month long trip to my city. She asked if we wanted to go out for drinks. I said “yes”. We had a great time. A week later she asked me to have dinner with her again. I said “yes”. I felt that we greatly connected on the second time we met up. However, I got the impression that she was just using me for company since she didnt have anyone in my city. Absolutely no romance was there. I also didnt like her texting habits. She would take so long to get back to me.

    I told her sarcastically that she would need to text me if wanted to meet up again before she left home. A few days later she did. But I didnt want go out that night so gave her a vague text. I texted her twice before she left and she never texted me back. I do know that she has made platonic friends in my city and they have gotten close together. I miss her as a friend. Im wondering if she is mad at me for not meeting her before she left? Should i try to contact her again or just let it go?

    gbola822
    gbola822
    Participant
    July 3, 2019 at 6:21 pm #203234

    You need to contact her.

    georcher123
    georcher123
    Participant
    July 3, 2019 at 7:04 pm #203235

    contact her!!!

    sambam4408
    sambam4408
    Participant
    July 3, 2019 at 11:15 pm #203238

    Maybe try contacting her one last time, try a different method of contacting her if you already texted her, just in case if the messages aren’t going through for some reason..

    sexyooo
    sexyooo
    Participant
    July 4, 2019 at 12:36 am #203250

    contact her and see what happens

    colinwall87
    colinwall87
    Participant
    July 4, 2019 at 3:27 pm #203258

    I got the impression that she only needed me because she didnt know anyone in my city. She tends to lead people on and use them. She didnt tell me that she tends to be cold. However, I can see someone getting mad if they dont want to hang out. I will giver her a text when the time is right.

    I have to admit that I do want closure. I dont like to end things in a negative way.

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    July 4, 2019 at 5:46 pm #203261

    First of all if this was not a romantic relationship you clearly do not need any “closure”.
    Someone who is in town for vacation is not “using anyone”.
    They’re looking to have a great time. Most people would enjoy showing visitors the best their town offers.

    ” I didnt want go out that night so gave her a vague text.”
    You knew her visit was coming to an end and chose to use some type of “power play” move.

    Acting like a jerk usually doesn’t make people want to reach out to you especially when they don’t really know you.
    You said (she) invited you to drinks, (she) invited you to dinner, and she invited you again before leaving.
    My guess is she is back at home with her real friends and has put the whole thing behind her.

    “I do know that she has made platonic friends in my city and they have gotten close together.”
    Therefore she was not “using you” since she became close with others.

    Sounds like YOU WANTED romance but saw there was no chance so then you felt “used”.

    wantsguyfun
    wantsguyfun
    Participant
    July 5, 2019 at 4:00 am #203271

    id give up

    colinwall87
    colinwall87
    Participant
    July 5, 2019 at 7:56 am #203266

    I paid for everything. She didnt pay a single thing. She told me that she would take trips with other guys and when the guy would make a move she would “put them in their place”. I didnt like this statement. It made me feel like i was just another sucker paying for her stuff. How about you say “thanks but no thanks” after a guy puts so much effort into you.

    she told me that she is cold. This is evident in her texts. she would text me back in hours while she would text other people fast. its almost like im low priority and a good place holder while she meets other people (her new friends).

    But i guess im the bad guy for spending money on her and not wanting to hang out with her on last minute notice.

    miguelmartinez99
    miguelmartinez99
    Participant
    July 20, 2019 at 4:43 pm #204059
    Reply To: Should I try again?

    contact her and say that youre sorry for acting like a jerk.

    anon1734
    anon1734
    Participant
    July 22, 2019 at 5:51 pm #204169
    Reply To: Should I try again?

    Contact her! Tell her you enjoyed your time with her and you want to catch up

    hk2437
    hk2437
    Participant
    July 23, 2019 at 8:47 pm #204242
    Reply To: Should I try again?

    Contact her, 100%!!

    Gaius
    Gaius
    Participant
    July 26, 2019 at 11:54 pm #204416
    Reply To: Should I try again?

    No

    colinwall87
    colinwall87
    Participant
    July 28, 2019 at 12:19 am #204428
    Reply To: Should I try again?

    Hey Guys,

    I tried emailing her and texting her. I really put in thought and emotion on both. I apologized. I explained that I felt bad for no seeing her. I asked for forgiveness and that I wouldnt like to lose her. She has ghosted me. I was ghosted a while ago and she has ghosted me again. There is nothing salvageable. I cant really have a dialogue with a person who refuses to communicate. She has moved on.

    I would like to have closure on why she has taken this course. Maybe its because she was using me and I dont have a use for her anymore? Maybe its because I didnt go out with her when she requested? not sure. I can only try to correct a perceived mistake. At the end of the day, she is gone and I will most likely never see her.

    thanks for the support

    colin