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darko1983ParticipantOctober 6, 2013 at 1:33 am #40678
I was recently dating a single mother and this was my first time ever dating one. I admit that I was going slow because she was divorced and I wanted us to take our time, however she insisted that ” what was there to think about’ we went to same schools together and grew up In the same neighborhood, and telling me to just take a leap of faith and trust it. I finally took on the challenge and started doing my research by learning on sites on how to be patient in this sort of relationship, this made me excited. So we start dating and getting to the point to where we would chat before bed and my heart was really opening up to her and her two daughters until something strange starting happening. One day I stopped hear from her. I tried texting, calling and leaving a voice mail but I got no response from her. I started to feel confused and lost, therefore back tracking to see if I went wrong somewhere. I finally receive a message from her stating that her ex husband had an overdose and she needs to be there for him and her daughters and that I don’t deserve to be put to the side while she tries to resolve these issues. I let her know that I understand and that I’m willing to wait for her if she’ll have me. She goes on to say that it’s not fair for me and that I deserve to be happy and that I need to find the perfect person for me. she keeps telling me its not fair for me like she wants me to walk on away on my own without her having to tell me to leave. why do you think that? I don’t want to lose her completely so I put out my friendship and she accepted it. I check on her and her daughters every once in a while and tells me that she appriecates that I check on her and that it means a lot. sometimes she will respond to my text sometimes she doesn’t. I know I cant be selfish and scream that its not fair because of the situation, but this guy was abusive and a bad father and I feel like I lost out at something special because of the “Florence Nightingale Effect”. I’m going to continue to be a supportive friend and be sensitive the whole way thru. What I’m wondering is what happens when my heart starts to feel at ease again and she wants to start over again? and if you have any advice for me on the whole situation, because I don’t know when to check on her or when to leave her alone.
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