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Max3732ParticipantAugust 11, 2014 at 6:05 pm #59218
I met this girl at a tennis class and invited her to play. She said one of the reasons she signed up was to meet people as good or better than her and would love to play and gave me her number.
So we met up and played and I’m a lot better than her, but she can play well enough to keep me on my toes. While playing we talked about all kinds of things and I thought had good chemistry. Afterwards she said she’d be good to play again next week.
When I asked her she said she may have plans that day with her boyfriend, but might be able to make it so would let me know. This was like a punch in the gut and the 1st I’d heard about a boyfriend.
How should I act around her in the class and should I ever ask her (or agree) to play with her? There are many guys that are better players than her, so should I play just in case she knows someone else or breaks up with her boyfriend or just forget about her?
preifipeParticipantAugust 13, 2014 at 6:07 pm #59420
if she has bf it is better to stop thinking abou her it is not right to break up a couple just find a single girl
Leonardo BustosParticipantAugust 13, 2014 at 8:11 pm #59430
Tennis is a game that starts with love. That being said, you have to ask yourself if you want her as a friend – and if the answer is yes and you enjoy her company – then you should continue to see her. However – the key is you need to act as if her mentioning a boyfriend had no effect on you at all. No need to raise a racket or even bring it up.
There may be a chance that her “boyfriend” is a very casual acquaintance – and it’s nothing serious. Women often say they have boyfriends to ward off unwanted advances. There’s also the chance that if you give some backhanded compliments or put some top-spin on your humor by playfully teasing and innocently flirting with her – you may grow on her and the net result could be a love match.
If she’s not worth your time or attention – fagetaboudit and politely tell her you need more of a challenge, or some other polite reason to move on.
In any case – remember to – Stay Sexy!
specialguyParticipantAugust 17, 2014 at 4:17 pm #59535
Not really convenient for you if she is committed to someone else as well. Imagine she breaks with her current boyfriend finally to be with you, and then she does exactly the same in the future with your relationship. Love is about honesty and trust, you can’t really trust her and expect her to be a good person in your life for a monogamous long term relationship and other aspects of family life, this plus you don’t really know the trouble you cause on this other guy when everything is done for him in that relationship, making people suffer brings Karma into life, and that’s not something you wanna be part of no matter how hot and “cool” she could be.
Meet someone convenient and be happy in a fair manner.
m47131ParticipantAugust 17, 2014 at 9:18 pm #59538
My only advice is to be her friend if you can handle it and in the meantime start talking and seeing other women.
hdiazParticipantAugust 18, 2014 at 2:46 am #59541
Find out how serious she is about her boyfriend and proceed from there
abcd321ParticipantAugust 18, 2014 at 1:28 pm #59556
It might be pretty painful if you will start to like her even more and then she will stay with her boyfriend and will be just friend with you or if you can handle it you can be just friends 🙂 good friends are always good but with female friends its sometime difficult ugh =/.
diva820ParticipantAugust 18, 2014 at 7:28 pm #59593
Hi Max3732. I’m a firm believer that people tell you initially who they are and their intentions. She said she joined the class to meet people who could play better than her. I would suspect that she’s trying to improve her game and one way to do that is to play and interact with others who are better than her. That’s where you came in. You obviously challenged her and she wants to play again, probably so she can get better than you.
She brought up her bf and you should take that as a cue that she’s only available for tennis and friendship. If you are interested in more than that, I would suggest you not play tennis with her again. But I’m also a firm believer in friendship (which sometimes develop into relationships). If you can truly be just a friend, play tennis, AND help her improve her game, that may go a lot further in the long run than you trying to focus on a relationship with her and she’s unavailable. If not, try Leonardo’s suggestion in para. 3 in comment above.
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