Ugly Breakup: Female opinion needed


Ugly Breakup: Female opinion needed

  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    January 30, 2016 at 10:08 am #92464
    Ugly Breakup: Female opinion needed

    I casually knew this girl and one day we decided to get lunch together. Long story short, we have so much in common and we dated for 4 months. I became her best friend, personal trainer, nutritionist, shopping partner, and more. I met her family and friends and it seemed like everything was perfect. She trusted me in telling me about all of the times guys have done her wrong and creeped on her and of course I became a little protective. But she actually was close friends with some of these creepy guys and I could not take it anymore because I cared about her. On top of that she blamed me for everything and would compare me to the guys who have hurt her in the past. She broke up with me over a phone call and then a text later. I talked to her 2 days later and she claimed she didn’t break up with me. So I broke up with her. How do I get over losing my best friend and immature/crazy girlfriend? Please help!

    January 31, 2016 at 10:41 am #92491

    What do you mean by a little protective? She is scared you are going to hurt her, so she is comparing you to the other guys because of similarity and triggers. You both have communication issues going on, google John Gottman’s FOUR HORSEMAN. I don’t know why she is still friends with men who have betrayed her, she sounds like she maybe insecure. She also sounds like you both have become too comfortable and perhaps no contact for a week may help make her miss you. Let her see what she is missing and vice versa. You both are in a new relationship and you both have triggers.
    I hope your heart heals and you can work this out because you sound like you really care about her. Good Luck!

    February 1, 2016 at 4:33 am #92515

    Well as a woman I usually do not keep in touch with men that hurt me in past unless I am not fully over it. The fact she keeps in touch with those guys is a red flag.
    Not sure why she said you hurt her. Do you know? Would be good to know what makes she thinks that.
    Looks like a communication breakdown may be going on.

    February 1, 2016 at 9:05 am #92499

    @fitnesscrz05 I appreciate the reply. But there is no chance we get back together. I have now learned that she talked shit about my friends behind my back. She is just too immature and selfish to be in a serious relationship. And on top of that her weird guy friends stare me down and try to intimidate me when they see me. So it’s over and she’s probably gonna get taken advantage by other guys