Urgent help with online date

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Urgent help with online date

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
    December 12, 2019 at 8:10 am FORUM ANNOUNCEMENT

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    Cambridgegirl
    Cambridgegirl
    Participant
    March 24, 2019 at 7:31 am #197489
    Urgent help with online date

    I’ve met a man a charming man on a dating site. Within 3 days of writing he wanted to go offsite, saying we had to hurry as he was going on holiday in a week. He seemed friendly and nice but a bit too keen. He had mixed photos of him scuba diving, head shots and one bare top body (which was a slight red flag). We exchanged emails. He kept pushing like crazy for my phone number, (I didn’t give it), calling me hunni, hardly ever addressed me by my first name, kept saying he wants to hug me, wake up with me. It seems overly familiar, and I don’t like it, as I am not this forward before a first date. He seems to check out in the business world and is a businessman. Oh, and I wanted to meet for coffee, keeping it a day date, but he keeps suggesting dinner. We are meeting at a cosy local hotel this coming Tuesday.
    I have had other contacts and not felt this uneasy. Intuition tells me ‘No’ not for me. I think I want to back out as I think I will feel on edge. I would love some advice.

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    March 24, 2019 at 11:27 am #197490

    “Within 3 days of writing he wanted to go offsite..”
    “He kept pushing like crazy for my phone number..”
    “kept saying he wants to hug me, wake up with me. It seems overly familiar, and I don’t like it…”
    “I wanted to meet for coffee, keeping it a day date, but he keeps suggesting dinner. We are meeting at a cozy local hotel..”
    “Intuition tells me ‘No’ not for me. I think I want to back out..”

    If something doesn’t {feel right} to you it’s probably NOT right for YOU!
    Ignoring intuition leads to having regrets.

    Just because someone is going on holiday does not mean you have to speed anything up.
    Never let anyone dictate YOUR mate selection process or force you into uncomfortable situations.
    Giving someone this kind of power early on sets the stage for you to be seen as less than equals.

    Ideally this guy is not be the ONLY guy you’re communicating with online.
    When people focus on one person too soon they unknowingly become overly emotionally invested.

    My advice: Trust your instincts. Move on!

    frankt
    frankt
    Participant
    March 24, 2019 at 12:31 pm #197500

    “saying we had to hurry”
    To me, that creates questions in my mind.

    “calling me hunni, hardly ever addressed me by my first name”
    Sounds like he is trying to sweet talk you (you are a stranger to him).
    Why sweet talk a stranger ?

    “saying he wants to hug me, wake up with me”
    That is overly sexually suggestive considering you two haven’t even met yet.
    Sounds like he has already concluded you are the person for him and vice versa

    This might be a “sex visit” !

    montana1965
    montana1965
    Participant
    March 25, 2019 at 9:45 am #197549

    Never hurts to have a wing girl, I see a couple red flags as well