What’s wrong with me?

DATING ADVICE FORUM

What’s wrong with me?

    Author
    Comments
  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
    June 6, 2019 at 8:13 pm FORUM ANNOUNCEMENT

    Hey DatingAdvice.com forum readers! Just a quick heads up that a few dating sites are offering a FREE trial to DatingAdvice forum readers. Try it now and meet local singles in just a few minutes! Here are the sites:

    Site Who You'll Meet Today's Deal
    Match.com Casual dating for ages 18-65 Get FREE access
    EliteSingles Educated professionals 25 and older Get FREE access
    AFF.com Hookups, casual encounters Get FREE access

    What are you waiting for? One mouse click could be all that stands between you and your next romance!

    jonchernov
    jonchernov
    Participant
    April 16, 2019 at 11:35 am #198686
    What’s wrong with me?

    Hey, my name’s Jonathan and I’m a 17 year old who is struggling. I have not had much success with girls since I started high school three years ago and any relationship I’ve been in has ended horribly. I’ve been cheated on twice and none lasted longer than 5 weeks. I don’t know what’s wrong with me or what I need to do. I’m 5’10” 215 pounds. Over the past 6 months, food has controlled me because I’m so self conscious about my weight. I’ve lost 30 pounds in that time but in an unhealthy way. I hate having to try to meet society’s expectations of a perfect body. Obviously I’m not that confident and I have social anxiety so meeting people can be hard and I overthink everything. I hope someone can give me what I need to get past this and succeed in the dating world.

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    April 16, 2019 at 6:23 pm #198689

    Relax!
    There’s nothing “wrong” with you.
    A large percentage of teenage boys go through the same thing during their high school years.
    The main problem with being young is you lack vision for your potential future.
    Teenagers always believe “right now” is all there life will ever be.
    Truth be told your teenage years a small snapshot of your life. Most of your life occurs as an (adult).

    Typically guys in high school guys fall into various categories:
    The jocks, musicians/singers, funny/extroverts, popular, good looking, average, unattractive, nerdy, and introverts.
    If you fall into the last three categories you probably don’t socialize or have many friends in the other groups.

    Once you go away to college you can erase your high school years while making new friends on campus.
    “I hate having to try to meet society’s expectations of a perfect body.” Please don’t B.S. yourself!
    Being 5’10 and 215lbs at age 17 most likely isn’t healthy. Do your best to look your best for yourself!

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    April 16, 2019 at 7:01 pm #198691

    Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and everyone is entitled to have their own preferences.
    One of the reasons so many “nice guys” are lonely is because they don’t pursue “nice girls”.
    Every guy wants to date a girl who is “hot”. How many 200lb girls have you hit on lately?
    Too many guys would rather aim for girls “out of their league” , suffer rejection, and deal with depression.
    Newsflash! In the “real world” Danny DeVito is not going to end up with Charlize Theron.
    That’s what fantasies are for!

    Once you become of legal age to drink and go out to bars and nightclubs dating gets easier.
    It also doesn’t hurt to be great or good at something that garners attention.
    Success has a way of building confidence and attracting others. Women love confidence.

    Contrary to the “nice guys” beliefs most women are {not comfortable} being put up on a pedestal!
    Their own parents, siblings, best friends don’t treat them like that! Ultimately everyone wants to (feel comfortable).
    Behavior they’re not accustom to is often seen as creepy or a turn off.

    timber81
    timber81
    Participant
    April 17, 2019 at 6:52 pm #198728

    I know it easier said then done but just got to have confidents in yourself, even if it may take you time to get to that headspace. Also maybe the right women just hasn’t presented herself to make a long term relationship yet. first learn to love yourself then loving others will come on its own.

    totallynotjohn
    totallynotjohn
    Participant
    April 18, 2019 at 4:03 pm #198791

    Hey man you are still young, You might start working out for get a healthier lifestyle, set your self some goals, crush those goals. Try to socialize as much as possible. How small, don’t force it but start a small talk with the cashier at the supermarket. You need to push yourself slightly out of the comfortzone untill you have so much confidence that it people will ask your guidance, however it is easier as done. It takes alot of time, but in the end it pays off

    Ajquestions
    Ajquestions
    Participant
    April 18, 2019 at 4:57 pm #198809

    There’s NOTHING wrong with you! Relationships are so rocky at this age for a lot of people. A lot of p3ople are still immature and do immature things. You have your whole life ahead of you and I can bet that someday you’ll find someone who treats you the way you deserve to be treated

    Mach10
    Mach10
    Participant
    April 19, 2019 at 7:45 am #198820

    Jonathan, the only thing wrong with you is the fact that you thing that there is something wrong with you. I can relate with your social anxiety and what worked out for me is very simple: I started reaching out to people ( friends, family, college) on the phone and just catching up. The other thing worked ( but it was really hard) was getting a job in sales.

    Chill, it all works out, focus on the bigger picture 🙂

    jkpreme1
    jkpreme1
    Participant
    April 21, 2019 at 2:20 am #198948

    I don’t think anything is