When tragedy hits someone you're dating… how to act?


When tragedy hits someone you're dating… how to act?

  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    July 4, 2017 at 2:08 am #141283
    When tragedy hits someone you're dating… how to act?

    Hi There, I’ve been dating this guy for a couple of months. We seem to like each other very much & taking it slow. We are living our own lives but getting to know each other, hanging out & becoming really good friends. We talk about the future a lot. Over the last month or so he’s dad has become exceptionally ill, so obviously that’s become a priority for him. Though the communication between us has died down, we are still talking to each other & he’s keep me posted on his dads progress. I assume this is a good thing? My only concern is I don’t really know what to do, i do care about him a lot. It’s a fairly new relationship so I don’t want to intrude & I want to give him space. I feel like a broken record but always say to him I’m here for him & if he needs to chat he can always call me. He always says thank you. Every couple of days i check up on him and he always replies. I’m also concern that this going to change our relationship? Any advice?

    July 7, 2017 at 10:06 am #141390

    You have to allow for the possibility that this difficult period in his life will push you both apart. It’s hard because his father’s illness came at a very tender time in your time together.

    There’s not much you can do except to do what you say you’ve been doing. Let him know you’re there and that he can call on you for strength and help.

    The thing is that he may simultaneously want and not want your help. Men like to do things by themselves often and can only deal with their emotions in their own space and time.

    I suggest that you back off a little. If what you’re doing hasn’t been working, it’s time to try a new approach. Let him come to you now. If he doesn’t then it’s not meant to be. You have to protect yourself too

    July 7, 2017 at 6:27 pm #141396

    I solely agree with @Maximillian Michaels. My only addition is that I think you should give him his space a bit, he might need it. The benefit of this is that if he does contact you after not hearing from you, then you’ll know it is for real. If he doesn’t, that is not a good sign!