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LauraCernal29ParticipantSeptember 5, 2018 at 8:05 pm #183503
Last night, I saw something on my boyfriend’s laptop right before he shut it down so we could sleep. I saw that he had a tab open to google, showing results to “how to search women by ID”. I felt uneasy about it the whole night and kept waking up. When I woke up, he already left for work. I was browsing fb on my phone and opened his profile. That’s when I realized that he had erased all our photos together. I opened instagram and twitter and saw that he had deleted our pics there too. For some reason, I kept thinking of that tab he left open. Why did he delete them? Do you guys think it has something to do with his search history?
WoozyParticipantSeptember 8, 2018 at 5:13 pm #183764
It might be uncomfortable, but the only way you’ll be able to know why he erased your photos is to ask him directly. No one on this forum can tell you why he did it; it would all just be speculation. Broach the topic softly but directly, and be prepared for a confrontation. Stay calm and prepare yourself mentally for any situation; he may get defensive or he may have a legitimate reason for deleting your photos. Be ready for either. I wouldn’t mention his search history right away because he may take that as an intrusion on his privacy, and that will escalate the situation very quickly.
The easy way out would be to just let this blow over, but it sounds like this is troubling you and that discomfort will only grow throughout the life of your relationship. Calm and honest communication is key.
whitney0587ParticipantSeptember 8, 2018 at 6:00 pm #183768
I’m sorry that happened! But I feel Woozy had a great response and you should calmly ask him about it. Hopefully, everything is okay!
dashingscorpioParticipantSeptember 8, 2018 at 11:43 pm #183781
1. “he had a tab open to google, showing results to “how to search women by ID”.
2. “he had erased all our photos together. I opened instagram and twitter and saw that he had deleted our pics there too.”
The primary reason why someone would delete all pictures of them with someone is because they want to appear single.
Usually this means someone either has plans to cheat on you or dump you.
The only thing you did not mention was whether or not he changed his “relationship status”.
You basically have two options.
You can mention to him (in passing) you noticed the other day he had removed photos of the two of you from FB.
If he’s automatically defensive or his answer doesn’t make any sense you have to decide if lying/cheating is a “deal breaker”.
If something doesn’t feel right to you it’s probably not right for you.
Unless you have a history of being paranoid, insecure, or overly suspicious then there’s no reason not to trust your gut.
If you don’t trust him, dump him.
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