Why Did He Talk To Me Only After I Blocked Him?

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Why Did He Talk To Me Only After I Blocked Him?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
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    May 10, 2018 at 6:59 pm #172865
    Why Did He Talk To Me Only After I Blocked Him?

    Met him on a recent trip. We didn’t know each other beforehand. Initially he came across moody and standoffish. I didn’t talk to him at all and just hung out with my friends. A couple of days in he started trying to talk to me and kept asking me the same question over and over (about my church.)
    The night before we came back to the states the group went out to eat at a restaurant and out of nowhere he asked me to sit next to him at his table. I was shocked and nervous, said “no thank you”, and stumbled over to another table with my friends.

    Before the dinner was over he came to my table and asked me if we could keep in touch as in FB. Again I was shocked but agreed. When we returned to the states he sent me a FB request and I accepted. The only thing, he didn’t talk to me at all. Instead, he started copying everything I did. As in, if I put up a picture of the beach, he would do the same thing. If I quoted an inspirational saying, he would do the same thing and on and on.

    May 10, 2018 at 7:00 pm #172866

    …Continuation

    He even changed his profile picture to reflect a younger version of himself when he was more virile and handsome.

    I eventually got tired of him not talking to me and just copying me so I blocked him. Needless to say a few days later he emailed me and invited me to a X-mas party. I couldn’t attend so I politely declined and thanked him and he said he hoped to see me again.

    Question: Is he playing games? He seemed so normal in the email. Why couldn’t he be normal on FB?

    Another thing he did on the trip he called me over one day and tried to introduce me to another guy? And was sort of trying to ask me if I was interested in him. Huh?

    pakster123
    pakster123
    Participant
    May 11, 2018 at 5:39 am #172876

    Chances are he liked you but was trying to push you away. He’s finally realized he needs to get his sh** together so he’s talking to you.
    For me, my bf acted standoffish too. He was like I don’t want a relationship and would reject my advances. Finally, when I told him I was done with him, he confessed that he liked me and was deliberately rejecting me because he did not want to admit it. Good luck to you.

    May 11, 2018 at 12:31 pm #172938

    Thank you, pakster123,

    Wow, did your boyfriend ever tell you specifically why he was rejecting you and didn’t want to admit that he liked you? Was it something that had to do with him?

    pakster123
    pakster123
    Participant
    May 21, 2018 at 6:57 pm #174827

    He told me he was insecure. He also didn’t want to admit that he liked me.

    May 31, 2018 at 9:32 pm #175841

    Thanks.

    foreverghosted86
    foreverghosted86
    Participant
    June 2, 2018 at 5:16 am #175962

    Honestly, I think that he possibly isn’t sure how to talk to you, past asking questions, and is therefore asking any questions he can think of.
    As for the copying on Facebook, that may be an attempt to keep it attention in the hopes you will message him.
    If you like him, talk to him, it can be hard work with someone like this but he maybe more nervous than you and trying not to scare you off by appearing needy or desperate.
    You say you’ve turned him down a few times now, but have you ooffered an alternative? You couldn’t attend a party, which is fine, but his reply of hoping to see you again is him asking if you can arrange some other time to meet up. Why dont you email him and say that it sorry you can’t come to the party, but would he like to meet for xyz, and then suggest when you are free.

    Of course, if you don’t like him and aren’t intrested then you need to tell him.
    Good luck

    June 3, 2018 at 11:17 am #175987

    Thank you, foreverghosted86.

    No, I didn’t offer an alternative after turning him down a few times…I wasn’t thinking! I spent so much time overanalyzing everything. He is also shy, reserved and aloof so I think it may have taken a lot out of him just to do all the things he did, and as you mentioned he could see that I am shy and inexperienced too and perhaps didn’t want to scare me off. Aaarrrgghh I wish he would have just talked to me straight up and we could have avoided all of this nonsense! I’m sad because I may have missed my chance.

    dashingscorpio
    dashingscorpio
    Participant
    June 3, 2018 at 4:26 pm #176000

    You said: “I eventually got tired of him not talking to me and just copying me so I blocked him.”
    Essentially that statement admits you were (interested in him) as well.
    Getting to know or date a shy introvert might be too much work.
    Two shy people want the (other) to initiate conversations. Sound like this guy lacks confidence and is insecure.
    Life is too short to be talking on projects. If you have to “figure out” what someone wants they’re not “the one” for you.

    It’s a waste of mental energy and time trying read into what someone said or did.

    June 3, 2018 at 5:10 pm #176003
    Reply To: Why Did He Talk To Me Only After I Blocked Him?

    You said: “I eventually got tired of him not talking to me and just copying me so I blocked him.”
    Essentially that statement admits you were (interested in him) as well.
    Getting to know or date a shy introvert might be too much work.
    Two shy people want the (other) to initiate conversations. Sound like this guy lacks confidence and is insecure.
    Life is too short to be talking on projects. If you have to “figure out” what someone wants they’re not “the one” for you.

    It’s a waste of mental energy and time trying read into what someone said or did.

    Agreed.

    I’m very shy and for some reason all I attract are shy guys…so frustrating! It’s always been very difficult to connect because no one wants to make the first move. Obviously there is some interest on my behalf (I made a whole thread about him.)

    June 3, 2018 at 5:14 pm #176004
    Reply To: Why Did He Talk To Me Only After I Blocked Him?

    In addition, I posted this question because I wanted to get some more feedback as I tend to overthink, miss some blind spots, and ultimately confuse myself. It becomes like a fog and then I can’t decipher if the guy ever really liked me or not. I just wanted to be sure he wasn’t a game player. I guess I can believe that he is simply a shy guy and has difficulty communicating like myself.

    September 2, 2018 at 6:22 am #183287
    Reply To: Why Did He Talk To Me Only After I Blocked Him?

    Also, he is older/White (and a Reverend) and I am Younger/Black.