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amhughesParticipantNovember 4, 2014 at 11:23 pm #67036
A guy I had short fling with in college has resurfaced now, 5 years later. Let me give you a little back story: It lasted about 4 months and it ended because he didn’t want to commit. Since then he has been in several long term relationships but we still stayed in touch. Each time he broke up with a woman, he’d contact me shortly after. We’d go out, have an amazing time and at the end of the date make plans to see each other again soon… and then, like clockwork he’ll slowly disappear, until of course, he ends a relationship 6-12 months later. Foolish me, each time I’d get so excited thinking, “this is it! He’s ready to take this somewhere!” Although it took me a while, I finally saw the pattern confronted him about it the next time he preformed the disappearing act. He didn’t have much to say on the subject and we ended on bad terms. That was a year ago.
Well, he’s back again and is begging me to give him another shot. Which I’m weary to do, because I’m not willing to play his little game again. At the same time, something deep down makes me feel like this time he’ll be different (definition of Insanity?)
Should I give him another go, or trust the past and let it go?
horsegirl48ParticipantNovember 7, 2014 at 6:20 pm #67222
That is a tricky one…
It seems that he may have some commitment issues, seeing that he only lasts a certain amount of time before ending the relationship with someone. And then you are there in between. Remember, that is why your relationship with him didn’t work out originally.
Ask yourself ‘Does he genuinely care about me?’
It is 100% your decision if you want to take another risk or not. If you DO decide to give him another chance, maybe tell yourself this is his Final chance.
Do you think he would still go after you if you made him make an effort? (eg. don’t just say ‘yes’ to hanging out together).
I hope you work out something.
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