A Real Girl’s Expert Tips — How to Find a Girlfriend (Online)

Online Dating

A Real Girl’s Expert Tips — How to Find a Girlfriend (Online)

Gina Stewart Gina Stewart
Updated:

Say you’re ready to meet someone, but you’re not quite sure how to find a girlfriend online. Fear not, that’s what this guide is for. The online dating world is treacherous, but our dating experts have discovered its secrets and shortcuts, so you don’t have to waste your time on dead-end dates anymore.

In this article, we’ll take you through the 3 best online venues to meet a girl.

We’ve also included 5 tips for profile creation and messaging and 6 tips for the first date. So, basically, you can learn whatever you need to know about wooing women online and make a successful play for the gal of your dreams.

1. Try Online Dating Sites

Online dating is now the norm for meeting people — around 40% of American couples meet online — so let me be the first to welcome you to a whole new world of swiping, liking, matching, and flirting.

If this is the route you want to take, we have a list of 5 great dating sites to get you started. Any of the following top-rated dating sites would be perfect for single guys seeking a relationship.

★★★★★
4.9/5.0

Relationships: Friends, Dates, and Relationships

Match System: Browse by zip, age, appearance, more

Our Experts Say: “Match has facilitated the most dates and relationships of any dating site, and its large audience and high success rate make it our top review...” Full Review »

Browse Free: View Photos Now

★★★★★
4.7/5.0

Relationships: Serious Relationships

Match System: Search, Receive Partner Suggestions

Our Experts Say: “EliteSingles is a leading dating site just for busy, single professionals. More than 80% of members have earned a college degree, and most are looking for a serious commitment...” Full Review »

Browse Free: View Photos Now

★★★★★
4.7/5.0

Relationships: Casual Dates, Deep Relationships

Match System: Personality test suggests matches

Our Experts Say: “Accounting for 2% of U.S. marriages, eharmony's compatibility-based system and commitment-minded user base are ideal for those seeking a serious relationship...” Full Review »

Browse Free: View Photos Now

★★★★★
4.5/5.0

Relationships: Friendship, Casual Dates, Serious Relationships

Match System: Search by age, location, height, education, ethnicity, and religion

Our Experts Say: “SilverSingles is a fast-growing, easy-to-use niche dating site exclusively for active daters over the age of 50...” Full Review »

Browse Free: View Photos Now

★★★★★
4.7/5.0

Relationships: Fun Dates, Serious Relationships

Match System: Search and get match recommendations

Our Experts Say: “Zoosk is integrated with social media sites, like Facebook and Google+, so it's very popular with singles on the go...” Full Review »

Browse Free: View Photos Now

As you can see, there are a lot of great options out there, and you really can’t go wrong on these well-respected sites. Of course, to ensure you have a good experience, you have to go in with a solid dating strategy. And we can help with that, too!

5 Tips Once You’ve Chosen a Dating Site

So what happens after you’ve signed up for a top-rated dating site? Follow these 5 tips for online dating success:

1. Know What Kind of Woman You Want

Choose women who have a lot in common with you. Maybe they are near your age range, close in location, express similar interests, or believe the same things. Decide which factors are important to you and use online dating’s search tools to focus on them. You should also make sure you want the same things in life. If you’re ready for a commitment, and she’s not, for example, things are not going to go your way.

2. Make Your Profile Stand Out From the Rest

Your dating profile is going to be your first impression to women, so it had better be on point. Promote the positive things about your personality. Try to be interesting, conversational, and authentic. Show off your sense of humor, be original, and talk in specifics about who you are and what you want. Finally, you should make it clear you’re in it to win it — say you’re looking for a relationship.

Photo of unique online dating profile

Try to be interesting and conversational. Show off your sense of humor, be original, and talk in specifics.

We also have a really helpful article on how to write a dating profile, particularly a dating profile headline that will catch her eye.

3. Only Use the Best Pictures of Yourself

Online dating photos are really important. They can show someone you took the time to put together an attractive profile, rather than just uploading the nearest bathroom selfie. If you have photos of yourself doing interesting things or traveling interesting places, those are the best to use. If you don’t have photos like that, consider asking a professional like Hey Saturday to take some head shots.

On the day of your photo shoot, dress sharp, whiten your teeth, and groom yourself. It will pay off when you see your likes and messages increase.

For more specifics, check out our article on profile pictures that do and do not work.

4. Read Her Profile and Get to Know Her Before Reaching Out

Be diligent in your approach and make effort to say something specific and unique in your first message — more than just “hi” at least. Ask her an interesting question or make a witty comment. After a little healthy banter, don’t be afraid to ask her to get coffee, drinks, or, dare I say it, dinner. Just keep it clean, fellas, you don’t want to be the guy who makes things sexual and creepy too soon.

Photo of man reading computer screen

Be diligent in your approach and make effort to actually get to know a girl.

Need an example of what you should say or how you should say it? Read our article on the first thing to say in online dating.

5. Stick With It and Don’t Give Up

The key to online dating is to not give up. After a bad experience, you may be tempted to believe online dating sucks and throw in the towel, but that’d be a big mistake. There is someone out there looking for you, too, and all you have to do is keep up the effort to find her!

2. Give Online Dating Apps a Shot

Since the goal is getting yourself a sweetie to curl up on the coach with, choose your dating app wisely. Try to use dating apps that offer more information about your date than just a picture and maybe a sentence or two. Your goal is to get to know someone and fall in love, right? So pick an app that will support that.

Dating Apps That’ll Help You Find a Girlfriend Online

We’ve selected 4 awesome dating apps for meeting women, but for even more options, you might want to scroll through our article about the 12 best online dating apps.

1. Hinge

Hinge pulls from your Facebook profile and Instagram feed to give people more context about who you are. The profiles include six photos, three personalized prompts, and information regarding age, occupation, education, religion, drinking habits, and so much more. We recommend filling in all the blanks so women can see all you have to offer.

Photo of Hinge app

Hinge connects you with friends of friends, making it easier to find a girlfriend.

Another great thing about Hinge is that it requires singles to like or comment on something specific to spark a connection. That makes it easier to start a conversation and discover common interests. It really works too — I know someone who met her boyfriend on Hinge and someone else who met his wife on Hinge. It even worked for Mayor Pete.

2. Bumble

Bumble is like Tinder for feminists. You have to mutually match before you talk, but it requires women to make the first move and send the first message. This takes a lot of pressure off you, and it ensures that every lady in your inbox wants to be there. Just make sure you keep moving it forward once she messages you.

3. Coffee Meets Bagel

Coffee Meets Bagel is focused on delivering quality over quantity, so it limits the amount of matches it sends you per day. There is also more information on your match than Tinder or Bumble, along with a bunch of other features.

Photo of Coffee Meets Bagel

Coffee Meets Bagel focuses on on delivering quality over quantity.

Coffee Meets Bagel was founded by single women who wanted to stop singles from treating each other like disposable commodities. And, so far, they’ve done a great job.

4. Happn

At a festival? Beach? Bar? Convention? This gives you access to select and chat with mutually interested women you literally are crossing paths with. Happn may be limited in the info it gives you about the person, but what Happn wins at is showing you people who are right by you!

As with online dating sites, for any dating app make sure you have good pictures. Write clever tidbits about yourself. Be fun and try to make conversation wherein you’re genuinely interested. Then, after some pleasantries, move to meet in person for a date.

3. Make Use of Social Media

Believe it or not, a lot of couples have actually met on social media, so there’s no harm in utilizing something you probably already use to make a date. Heck, now there’s even Facebook Dating to help you out.

Social Media Sites That’ll Help You Find a Girlfriend Online

While there are hundreds of social media sites out there, we’ve found the top 3 that are good for socializing with women who can turn into girlfriends.

1. Meetup.com

This is a fantastic resource for finding new social outlets. You can join groups devoted to singles or ones surrounding an interest or activity.

Screenshot of Meetup.com

Meetup.com is a fantastic resource for finding new social outlets.

From book clubs to hiking excursions to Origami lovers, join or create a group, go on the outings, and let magic happen in person. If you saw someone at an event you like, you can use Meetup.com to message them directly.

2. Facebook

Look for local groups around things that are important to you or interest you. Maybe it’s a FB page for your community or for animal shelter volunteers. Most importantly, interact with other members and get involved.

And don’t just limit your interactions to pretty faces. You never know who is reading and paying attention to what you do in these groups, so just be yourself and get to know new people.

You can also use Facebook to comb through your friends’ friends. See a cutie? Ask your friend if she is single. Most people don’t spend their days thinking about being matchmaker, so sometimes you can nudge them and find a connection.

3. LinkedIn

While it’s known for being a business networking site, LinkedIn offers a lot of opportunities to connect with people you are interested in. Join groups related to your industry and share insights, articles, and ideas with other members.

Photo of LinkedIn connections

Finding connections you’re linked to on LinkedIn gives you the unique ability to initiate contact with women on a professional or intellectual level.

Finding connections you’re linked to on LinkedIn gives you the unique ability to initiate contact with women on a professional or intellectual level, using an exchange of ideas and resources as an entry way to getting to talk to her. For many men, this is much easier than trying to directly flirt or hit on someone. If she engages with you reciprocally, ask to meet sometime for coffee or lunch.

6 Tips for Before, During, and After the First Date

Don’t worry — we’re not gonna just leaving you hanging after you’ve found the woman of your dreams online. Here are 6 tips for what to do before, during, and after that crucial first date.

  1. Give her options of places close to her and let her pick from them.
  2. Expect to pay, so keep it reasonable to what is comfortable to your budget. If it’s a walk and some frozen yogurt, that is totally acceptable. Yelp is your friend for no-fail date ideas.
  3. Remember the details of her profile and your conversations. Keep some ideas in the back of your mind handy about topics to discuss.
  4. If you liked her, tell her you’d like to see her again.
  5. Ask her to text you when she gets home safe.
  6. And repeat

Viola. Before you know it, you’ll have a +1 to every wedding and a cuddle buddy every night. Good luck!

Photo sources: iac.com, oregonstate.edu, mainetoday.com, ionehellobeautiful.wordpress.com, impactiv8.com.au