The Men on Dating Sites Look Old. How Do I Meet Someone?

Dr. Wendy Walsh

Written by: Dr. Wendy Walsh

Dr. Wendy Walsh

Dr. Wendy Walsh is the author of "The 30-Day Love Detox"" (April 2013).

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles and reports have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement.

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Reader Question:

I am a very “young” 69-year-old woman. I do not look, feel or act my age. I have been on a dating site, but the men all look so old! I was in a relationship with someone who was 56 and I was 68. We had a great time, but he was still hung up on his ex-wife.

How do I go about meeting someone?

-Janet (Ohio)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Dear Janet,

You have two choices:

1. Send online invitations to men who look younger.

2. Analyze why you reject men who look their age. Might they remind you of yours?

I always ask people who have a youthful look and energy level: Are you pursuing health or denying age? There’s a subtle difference.

We all get old and wise and we all must learn to accept our bodies can’t do exactly what they did in prior decades.

But there are amazing gifts that come with someone who has grown up and is thriving in their role as elder guardian of the culture.

And since all relationships are about a mutual exchange of care, in this stage of life, it’s more important than ever to choose someone who can give care.

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