Jan. 1 is the universal day for starting new, making changes and beginning destined-to-fail dieting strategies. I may not be able to stop you from taking late night snack breaks, but I can at least make your commitment to online dating your successful ticket for 2013.
Feel free to put these as your screen saver and repeat them daily.
1. “I will set goals.”
It’s amazing what happens when you set specific, hard, numerical goals.
If you’re going on a diet, experts will tell you it’s important not to make goals simply like, “I am going to lose weight” or “I am going to eat better.”
The trick lies in saying, “I will lose 15 pounds by September” and “I will stop eating carbs after 4 p.m.”
As your online dating expert, I can tell you the same tricks work in the digital dating game.
Your goals should include things like: “I will contact XX people per week.” “I will respond to X people per month even though they don’t meet my entire checklist.” “I will go out on at least one date per month, no matter what.”
When you set goals, you automatically fill your actions to meet those goals. This means you’ll get more results.
Don’t go crazy. Goals won’t get kept if you make them unreasonable. Speaking of unreasonable, tip #2:
“Looking bright ‘n shiny goes a
long way in online dating success.”
2. “I will be reasonable.”
It is easy to sign into online dating thinking you can click a whole bunch of criteria and the magical Internet machine will churn out your perfect mate.
Some trivial things that stop too many daters from meeting a potentially awesome mate include the following:
- Bad grammar.
Not using the correct form of “they’re, their, there” doesn’t equate to someone being a bad partner!
Seriously, people. I see this way too often as a “deal breaker.” Not only is it silly, it can be learned!
- Bad facial hair/haircuts/clothes/makeup.
People look different in person with many wonderfully attractive qualities not visible until you’re face to face.
Furthermore, all of this is changeable. Don’t be so superficial and judgmental behind your computer screen.
- “We don’t have high match percentage.”
Beware, beware, beware of those match percentages and using that as a filter of who you correspond to.
I know you want to think there is a formula that helps dating sites know who you’ll like, but they don’t.
Studies show online dating algorithms don’t equate to real-life chemistry, so you might as well just throw them out at the start and meet as many people as it takes.
Speaking of doing what it takes, tip #3:
3. “I will change it if it doesn’t work.”
Are you not finding dates? Then you must change.
Get some new threads, new pics, a new haircut. Whether you like it or not, looking bright ‘n shiny goes a long way in online dating success.
Even easier changes include: what you write about yourself and the type of people you are contacting/responding to.
Good luck, online daters! May 2013 be the year you find your love and quit reading my articles!
Photo source: luc.edu