Joshua Pompey is an online dating and relationship expert, helping men and women succeed at online dating since 2009 and with a success rate of more than 99%.
Edited by: Lillian Castro
Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.
You approach a beautiful woman online. She responds. You become excited about all the possibilities the future might bring.
But within a few days, she’s suddenly off the grid, never to be heard from again. Maybe she’s just a flake, but maybe you’ve committed some of the cardinal sins of online dating that I am about to mention.
Let’s take a look at five ways to lose a girl online in five days:
1. Making her feel as if she is back in school.
Just because you are excited to talk to this woman, that doesn’t mean your email should be five hundred words long, filled with enough questions to make any woman beg for mercy.
Online dating needs to feel simple, easy and fun. It should not feel like a second job, especially these days when many women complete their responses via a cell phone.
2. Acting like her biggest fan.
She sounds great, fun and amazing, but that doesn’t mean you need to gush all over her, acting like you are her number one fan in her life.
Keep it cool and keep your cards close to your chest. There will be plenty of time for compliments once you two are both actually dating!
“If there is one thing you want to
avoid, it’s making small talk.”
3. Acting like a stalker.
She hasn’t responded in a day, so you take that as a sign to view her profile every five minutes to see when the last time she logged on was? Big mistake.
This will come off as creepy and stalkerish when she realizes you keep viewing her profile.
Just relax. People get busy. When the time comes, they will write back. Until then, live your life!
4. Sending follow-up emails.
If a girl hasn’t responded in a day or two, don’t even think about sending another email. She will get to it when she gets to it.
If and only if more than four or five days go by, then feel free to re-initiate the conversation by making a joke in regards to wondering what happened to her. “Ya know Marie, I’m going to need more attention than this or we just aren’t going to work out :P.”
Bringing it up in a playful way takes the creep factor out of the situation.
5. Making small talk.
If there is one thing you want to avoid at all costs, it’s making small talk. Be funny and be original.
Whatever you do, don’t resort to asking the same questions ever other guy on the Internet asks. This is the fastest way to bore a woman into disappearing.
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