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The dating market – could anything be so capitalistic? Yet we still trade ourselves in this market of hearts.
So how is one to approach this market of hearts? By breaking it down into simple marketing.
Like any marketable good, you need to get your marketing mix right. You need the right product. You need to promote it in the right way, have it in the right place and for the right price.
To attract the mate you’re after, you should know what you’re selling (you!) and how to get yourself into position to find the right mate.
Ready? Here we go!
You are the product. No, you’re not a piece of meat or a wallet. You are a person. You want to be the best person you can be, not for anyone else except yourself.
Take a good look at yourself in the mirror. Don’t be too proud or critical. Would you go out with you? What are your inner and outer beauties? What are your strengths? What can you bring to a relationship? Your humour? Your smarts? Your loyalty and love?
Write them down. You’ll be surprised at your many amazing qualities!
Then look at the areas for improvement. These are things you can improve just for yourself. Maybe you need to lose some weight. Maybe your wardrobe is out of date. Maybe it’s time to up-skill and get a better job. Are these superficial things? Perhaps.
You want to look great, not for anyone else (although looking good definitely has its benefits in the dating market!) but for yourself.
You want to be your best self, not your fake best self. Being human is about being on a constant journey for self-improvement.
Investing in yourself – your health, your relationships, your future, your happiness – is the best investment you can make. When you feel confident, you become more confident. And confidence is sexy!
I have to be honest here – you’ve got to know what goods you can attract and what goods you can afford.
Some things are priceless and everyone should expect, like love, respect and trust. Then there are other things money can buy. Want a girl who wears the latest trends? Expect to pay for this upkeep.
What I’m trying to say is find someone like yourself, someone you can relate to. Don’t cheapen and go out with just anyone. Don’t price yourself out of the market either.
I’m not suggesting you can’t date outside your own – not at all. I’m suggesting that you think about the long-term financial implications of dating. Is this controversial? Yes.
“Don’t be scared
to get out there.”
While the product is all about yourself, the promotion is all about how you show your fabulousness to others. You can look amazingly sexy and be fantastically confident, but if no one sees it, your chances of finding someone will be hampered.
Without a doubt, online dating and apps have seen us change the way we meet people. There’s also an old-timey way of meeting people. It’s called smiling!
Believe it or not, in the olden days, people would not sit on the train with their face buried in their iPhone or tablet and headphones on, forbidding anyone to even glance their way.
There are many ways you can promote yourself. Say hi to the girl in the coffee shop. Instead of putting headphones on when you’re on the bus, make eye contact and smile at the good-looking human in front of you.
Don’t be scared to compliment someone on their outfit, perfume or hairstyle. They’ll find it flattering. You could even find yourself with a phone number!
Put yourself out there. Promote yourself. Sure, it takes a bit of guts, but you’ve worked on yourself. You are feeling confident and sexy. You know who you are and what you want, and you’re not scared to show others how amazing you are.
Similar to promotion, you need to be in places where you can meet people. Online dating certainly takes the fear out of meeting people in many ways.
I’m not here to criticize online dating! Who can beat the feeling of a “cute-meet”?
You won’t find a date when you’re sitting at home. You certainly won’t meet a gal playing “World of Warcraft” with your buddies every night. Get out there!
Think about where you want to be in life. Think about the kind of partner you want.
Are you the outdoorsy type? Join a hiking club or photography group. Want to bring up your children in a religious environment? Start going to church, the temple, the synagogue or the mosque. Into sports? You know where to go.
Think about your future. Think about the activities you would like to do with your date. Chances are they are already doing those activities. They probably have already signed up for dancing lessons, a foreign language course or a bowling league.
Get out and go meet them! Know where your target market is, and then get out and meet people!
There are people out there just like you, looking for someone to call their someone.
Know yourself and be your best self. Know what you want when you start dating. Don’t close yourself off to something new or exciting, but know the direction you want the relationship to go in.
You’ll find the people you are after doing the things you’ll want to do. Of course, opposites attract but there is always an initial interest and something common that binds a couple.
Don’t be scared to get out there, roll up your sleeves and GET DATING!