Her Ex Died and She Needs Time. How Do I Show Her I Care?

Her Ex Died And She Needs Time How Do I Show Her I Care
Updated:
Dr. Wendy Walsh
Lillian Castro

By: Dr. Wendy Walsh

Editor: Lillian Castro

Our dating experts guide readers step-by-step through relationship challenges and romantic decisions in our popular series of advice articles.

Reader Question:

There is a woman (w/young child) that lives next to me. She seems to like me but when I asked her out, she said her ex-husband had died last August and she needs time.

What should I do in the meantime to show I do like her without being overbearing or insensitive?

-William Webb

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Oh William, I wish you lived next door to me!

OK, this is easy. Start to be helpful. Here are things single mothers need: carry groceries, offer to fix something or do paint touch ups, mow the lawn, shovel the snow.

In fact, do just about anything her husband might have done. (Don’t offer childcare. That can be creepy from a single guy neighbor.) Do these acts with a smile and no expectations in return.

If she likes you, she may chat longer with you on the porch as you leave. She may eventually invite you in for dinner.

If she does none of these things, know this: You are a good man who is doing a kind thing for a neighbor. Other women will notice this because the goodness will seep out your pores. This kindness will be repaid somewhere.


No counseling or psychotherapy advice: The Site does not provide psychotherapy advice. The Site is intended only for use by consumers in search of general information of interest pertaining to problems people may face as individuals and in relationships and related topics. Content is not intended to replace or serve as substitute for professional consultation or service. Contained observations and opinions should not be misconstrued as specific counseling advice.

About the Author

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Dr. Wendy Walsh

By: Dr. Wendy Walsh

Women's Dating Expert

Known as America's Relationship Expert, Dr. Wendy Walsh is an award-winning television journalist, radio host & podcaster, and the author of three books on relationships and thousands of print and digital articles. More than 1.5 million people follow her sage advice on social media. She holds a Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology and teaches in the Psychology Department at California State University Channel Islands and has been the host of "The Dr. Wendy Walsh Show" on iHeart Radio's KFI AM 640 since 2015. Walsh is also a former Emmy-nominated co-host of "The Doctors," as well as former host of the nationally syndicated show "EXTRA." She was named a Time Magazine Person of the Year in 2017 after speaking out about harassment at a major news network.

See Dr. Wendy's full bio »

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