I Can’t Find Women Who Share My Interests. Where is She?

Dr. Wendy Walsh

Written by: Dr. Wendy Walsh

Dr. Wendy Walsh

Dr. Wendy Walsh is the author of "The 30-Day Love Detox"" (April 2013).

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles and reports have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement.

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Reader Question:

I’m a 24-year-old male with a doctorate. I’m told by my female friends that I’m very charming, confident and good looking, but I can’t help but find myself somewhat cornered. I can hardly ever find women who share my interests and can hold intellectual conversations! I’ve exhausted the friends of friends and have tried online dating with nothing to show for it.

Where is she?

-Burhank (Boston)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

Dear Mr. Higher Thinker. Is the primary role of a mate to provide you with intellectual stimulation for your lifetime?

I understand you may have some social class clashes with someone with only a high school diploma, but learning to appreciate all facets of a woman will help you out.

Also, understanding that asking one person to satisfy all of your needs is a little unrealistic.

Let’s break down some of your possible current and future needs: friendship, care giving, sexuality, a shared financial partner, a good mother, and yes, an intellectual stimulator.

You say no woman shares your interests, but there are women engaging in virtually every traditionally “male” occupation and hobby.

Start by looking for her while you are engaging in your interests. And prioritize your needs. You might surround yourself with a bunch of platonic friends to stimulate your mind while a cozy mate stimulates other parts of you. 🙂

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