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Reader Question:
My parents do not like my girlfriend. In fact, they want me to break all ties with her after we got into a big argument.
My girlfriend and I want to try to work it out, but I’m afraid to disappoint my parents, whom already think I’m doing the exact opposite of what they say when it comes to my relationship (mind you, I’m still in high school).
What do I aim to fix? My fractured relationship or my parents’ mistrust with my decision making?
-Mike (Florida)
Gina Stewart’s Answer:
You sound like a very sensitive guy, Mike. I want you to channel that sensitivity into understanding why your parents are making that big of a demand on you.
In high school, I had a strained relationship with my parents, whom I felt were always checking up on me, requiring me to call when I got to places I said I was going. At the time, I hated it because I wanted to be up to no good and they made that very difficult!
In hindsight, I realize they actually just loved me and protected me from a lot of things I didn’t need to be a part of.
What are your parents trying to protect you from? Is this girl actually a bad influence on you? If so, heeding your parents’ advice is probably wise.
If this girl isn’t bad news, maybe you need to let them all get to know each other. A girl who cares about you will be sensitive to easing the tension with your parents, whom you obviously care about.
One piece of solid advice my parents gave that I carry in dating still is always choose to be with someone who inspires you to be a better person.
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