She Has Problems with Intimacy. How Do I Go About This?

Gina Stewart

Written by: Gina Stewart

Gina Stewart

Gina is the owner of Expert Online Dating. As an online dating consultant, she helps men and women maximize their online dating experiences to get more dates. You can visit her website,, for more information or to contact her.

See full bio »

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

Discuss This! Discuss This!
Advertiser Disclosure

Reader Question:

In August, my best friend got married. He kept telling me I need to meet his future sister-in-law. Once I met her, we totally hit it off.

The only problem was she was very reserved regarding intimacy. She told me she has had problems with intimacy since she broke up with her ex.

She told me she did like me but was not in a place to be seriously dating anyone. She wanted to maintain a friendship, but I couldn’t do that.

I don’t know if I should tell her how I feel or if I should still give her space.

How do I go about this?

-Josh (New York)

Gina Stewart’s Answer:

You’re not in a place to do anything. When someone tells you they don’t want to be with you, whether it be right now or ever, you just have to respect that.

There is such a thing as the right person but at the wrong time. If she’s not at that place yet, she’s just not there. If she has feelings for you, it’s in her court to come to you.

Meanwhile, you need to live your life.

No counseling or psychotherapy advice: The Site does not provide psychotherapy advice. The Site is intended only for use by consumers in search of general information of interest pertaining to problems people may face as individuals and in relationships and related topics. Content is not intended to replace or serve as substitute for professional consultation or service. Contained observations and opinions should not be misconstrued as specific counseling advice.

Advertiser Disclosure is a free online resource that offers valuable content and comparison services to users. To keep this resource 100% free, we receive compensation from many of the offers listed on the site. Along with key review factors, this compensation may impact how and where products appear across the site (including, for example, the order in which they appear). does not include the entire universe of available offers. Editorial opinions expressed on the site are strictly our own and are not provided, endorsed, or approved by advertisers.

Our Editorial Review Policy

Our site is committed to publishing independent, accurate content guided by strict editorial guidelines. Before articles and reviews are published on our site, they undergo a thorough review process performed by a team of independent editors and subject-matter experts to ensure the content’s accuracy, timeliness, and impartiality. Our editorial team is separate and independent of our site’s advertisers, and the opinions they express on our site are their own. To read more about our team members and their editorial backgrounds, please visit our site’s About page.