He Doesn’t Message Me As Much. Is He Being Shy?

Dr. Wendy Walsh
Dr. Wendy Walsh Updated:
Discuss This! Discuss This!
Advertiser Disclosure

Reader Question:

A few days ago I went on a date with someone who is two years younger than me from an online dating site. Our date lasted four hours and we had a good time. At the end of the date, he suggested that next weekend he would want to hang out and even offered to walk me home. But I am going crazy thinking he’s not into me because he doesn’t message me on Facebook or on the dating site as much now.

Is he just being shy and keeping it cool, or should I forget about him altogether?

-Corrine (British Columbia)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

The answer is probably yes to both of your questions. It’s only been a few days, Corrine. I’d be more worried about a cling-on who calls soon after the date.

You need to contain yourself and see what unfolds before you make predictions about the future. And yes, one technique to containing yourself is to forget about him altogether and focus your attention elsewhere.


No counseling or psychotherapy advice: The Site does not provide psychotherapy advice. The Site is intended only for use by consumers in search of general information of interest pertaining to problems people may face as individuals and in relationships and related topics. Content is not intended to replace or serve as substitute for professional consultation or service. Contained observations and opinions should not be misconstrued as specific counseling advice.

Advertiser Disclosure

DatingAdvice.com is a free online resource that offers valuable content and comparison services to users. To keep this resource 100% free, we receive compensation from many of the offers listed on the site. Along with key review factors, this compensation may impact how and where products appear across the site (including, for example, the order in which they appear). DatingAdvice.com does not include the entire universe of available offers. Editorial opinions expressed on the site are strictly our own and are not provided, endorsed, or approved by advertisers.

Our Editorial Review Policy

Our site is committed to publishing independent, accurate content guided by strict editorial guidelines. Before articles and reviews are published on our site, they undergo a thorough review process performed by a team of independent editors and subject-matter experts to ensure the content’s accuracy, timeliness, and impartiality. Our editorial team is separate and independent of our site’s advertisers, and the opinions they express on our site are their own. To read more about our team members and their editorial backgrounds, please visit our site’s About page.