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I met this guy about two and a half months ago. About a month ago, I asked him if he was seeing anyone else and he said no. I said I was not either.
However, since then we haven’t really had a “defining the relationship” conversation. Our relationship has become sexual, but I feel short-changed in an emotional sense.
I ran into an old flame at a bar, and he ended up walking me home and we kissed. I don’t intend to date this old flame.
Do I need to tell the current “guy” about my incident? Is this cheating? Is this guy wasting my time, or should I ask him to “DTR”?
-Dee D. (New York)
Oh my, Dee. So many questions. OK, let me break this down for you. Like so many young women in America today who think that female sexuality is the same as a man’s, you engaged in sex before a commitment and now are paying the emotional price.
But it’s not too late to get some definition. It takes bravery. But staying in a low-criteria relationship will hurt you in the long run. And, no, you don’t need to tell the current guy about the kissy-face with the old flame.
But after you have that “defining the relationship” conversation, you better act like a good girlfriend and stay away from all the hot flames, old and new.
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