I’m Not Good at Flirting. Can You Give Me Advice?

Dr. Wendy Walsh
Dr. Wendy Walsh Updated:
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Reader Question:

I just recently found my ex on Facebook and we have been talking. I’m looking for a website that will teach me how to flirt. I’m not very good at it and wondered if you could give me some advice on that?

-Michelle (Massachusetts)

Dr. Wendy Walsh’s Answer:

First of all, are you sure you want to become a “retrosexual” — someone who dates a long-ago love? Time often helps you put on a pair of rose-colored glasses that focuses on only the good things about an old relationship, but, for the most part, people don’t change much.

I guarantee if you get back together, you’ll suddenly remember quite clearly why you broke up.

Having said that, let me turn to your real question…how to flirt. The best way to flirt is in person with body language, giggles, hair flips and fun, nervous glances. But if you’re asking me how to flirt online, I say, stick to compliments, and if you do get into sexually suggestive language, use only metaphors.

“Gosh, I was thinking about that time we nearly started a house fire with all the heat one night” is much more flirtatious than “I miss your penis.”

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