Is Work You Scaring Dates Away

Women's Dating

Is “Work You” Scaring Dates Away?

Marni Battista

Written by: Marni Battista

Marni Battista

Marni Battista, founder of Dating with Dignity, has professional training in dating and relationship coaching as well as training in the Core EnergyCoaching Process from the Institute of ProfessionalExcellence in Coaching (IPEC).

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

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Dating can sometimes feel like a full-time job. We get it. But the way to take it easy (for less stress and less feeling like you’re forcing yourself to date) and make it fun is to make sure you’re showing up as the authentic “date you” rather than the more masculine, get-it-done “work you!”

“Work you” can be overstressed, tired, aggressive and cranky. She wants answers and she wants them now.

“Work you” can also be a woman who’s impatient, intolerant and rigid. Let’s be clear: This is not the way you want to show up for a date.

We’re not saying you have to turn into a damsel in distress or play the “dumb” card, but we do want you to be the best version of you: a successful woman who’s also rested, intelligent and a go-getter!

Either way, it’s important to be able to transition from “work you” to “date you” for your after-work meet and greets!

Dating with Dignity has some pointers for how to do this effortlessly:

1. Bring a bag with a sexy, fresh outfit.

If you get dressed and ready for your happy hour date at 8 a.m., chances are even if you get a chance to freshen up, you aren’t going to feel shiny and new.

Instead, bring a change of clothes and your “Dating with Dignity Sexy Alpha Fem Goody Bag.”

Your goody bag can include perfume, a pair of sexy power panties, power pumps, a hot new eyeliner that perhaps isn’t your basic black and a signature accessory that’s a great conversation piece.

Doing this quick change before you go out will help you get excited and into your feminine mojo, thus increasing your attraction factor dramatically.

“Rushing into a date without taking a

minute will ensure ‘work you’ shows up.”

2. Schedule an early workout the day of your post-work date.

An early morning yoga sesh is a wonderful way to start your day!

Not only will you pump yourself full of endorphins, but the two- to five-minute meditation at the end of your workout can help put you into a positive, hopeful state.

In addition, a healthy dose of early morning self-care will help you feel good about your curves (not to mention it ensures you take a shower before your date)!

Whether it’s yoga or a 20-minute walk around your block, moving your body in some way before your date will help bring good feminine energy to your evening.

3. Take a breath BEFORE you meet for drinks.

Rushing straight into a date and checking your email one last time while you’re waiting for him to arrive (or pick you up) without taking a minute to relax will definitely ensure “work you” shows up to meet your date.

Create a specific, intentional transition from work to romance. Shut down your computer, turn off your phone and take quiet time to connect to your feminine self.

Whether you meditate, take time to create the mental list of what you’re grateful for in your life as a single woman or just take three deep, diaphragmatic breaths, slowing down can help you transition seamlessly into making a good first impression.

Remember, having a career doesn’t mean you need to bring it on your date like a third wheel.

Leave that “work you” at work, connect to your sexy alpha female and remember dating with dignity can be fun!

So what do you think? How do you go from “work you” to “date you”? Do any of these tactics work for you?

By Marni Battista, founder and CEO of Dating with Dignity

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