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Sometimes it can feel like your dating life is going nowhere. Maybe you’ve been on a handful of first dates now, and just none of them really went anywhere.
You might feel like your social life is stuck in the spin cycle. Nothing is just really moving forward.
What can you do?
Well, you can be proactive to advance your social life, not just your romantic life.
Maybe it’s the sorority sisters thing, but I was raised with the social etiquette of thinking about the other women in my house’s social life, not just mine.
So when we met some cute guys in college, we didn’t just aim to get the guy for us. We also extended the social invitation to our house parties to his friends.
Keep in mind just because your dates weren’t a match doesn’t mean they won’t be good for one of your friends in your extended social circle.
If you two share any intriguing common interests which you both pursue, like swing dancing or ice hockey, then aim to weave them into your social group.
Be forthright about what you’re doing so they’re not worried you’re trying to get them to continue dating you under a false guise of friendship.
“Most of people in their 40s and 50s
could use having more friends.”
Try something like:
“Bob, I’m so glad we got to meet. Your fun sense of humor in your emails is just the same in person. Thank you for the drinks.
I just didn’t feel that special spark with you. I’m sure you feel the same way. But we’re both such fans of square dancing. Would it be OK if when we’re having a party for it I send you an invitation?
There are a number of single women in their late 40s in my club. What do you think?”
I suggest this not only for the sake of all of your friends, but also for your date’s sake. They might be feeling like it’s difficult for them to meet quality singles like you in their age.
Your warm and gracious social gesture is a gift. Most of people in their 40s and 50s could use having more friends.
Help each other out by keeping the good ones and bringing them into your circle of friends.
Do you stay friends with someone who wasn’t a romantic match?
Photo source: bp.blogspot.com.
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