What To Do When He Stops Texting

Women's Dating

What to Do When He Stops Texting: 7 Ways to Deal (Feb. 2024)

Hayley Matthews

Written by: Hayley Matthews

Hayley Matthews

Hayley has over 10 years of experience overseeing content strategy, social media engagement, and article opportunities. She has also written hundreds of informational and entertaining blog posts. Her work has appeared in numerous publications, including Bustle, Cosmo, the Huffington Post, AskMen, and Entrepreneur. When she's not writing about dating news, relationship advice, or her fantasy love affair with Leonardo DiCaprio, she enjoys listening to The Beatles, watching Harry Potter reruns, and drinking IPAs.

See full bio »

Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Discuss This! Discuss This!
Advertiser Disclosure

So, he’s stopped texting you, and it’s driving you crazy, huh? Been there. Look, being ghosted is never fun — I think I checked my phone 300 times one day while waiting for a text I was pretty sure was never coming — but it’s not the end of the world. It may not even be the end of the relationship. You’ve just got to take a breath, set aside your insecurities and fears, and think about your options.

According to CNN, 6 billion texts are sent every day in the U.S. Our phones give us instant access to our friends, family members, and crushes, but what should you do when the chatty guy you like all of a sudden stops being chatty? Here are 7 ways to deal with his silence:

1. Consider Moving On

If it’s been a long time since you two have talked, like 2+ weeks, you should think about moving on and finding a boyfriend who can summon the effort to text you back and carry on an adult conversation.

One of the best ways to find a nice new guy is by creating a dating profile on a dating site. Our experts have tested numerous dating sites and found Match to be the #1 choice for single women seeking a real relationship.


Relationships: Friends, Dates, and Relationships

Match System: Browse by zip, age, appearance, more

Our Experts Say: “Match has facilitated the most dates and relationships of any dating site, and its large audience and high success rate make it our top review...” Full Review »

Browse Free: View Photos Now

Match has the highest success rate of any other dating site and will help you find local single men — no matter if you’re looking for a date, relationship, or marriage. You can even try Match free for 3 days to see if it’s the right fit for you.

2. Don’t Take It Personally

If a guy has stopped texting you, the main thing to remember is to not blame yourself… or take your feelings out on your phone by throwing it across the room. It’s not your fault. It’s not your phone’s fault. It’s not even the guy’s fault (maybe).

Most of the time, people don’t mean to ignore text messages. We all forget to respond sometimes. He probably just got busy. Or he was with a friend and didn’t want to be rude by texting. Or his phone died or got lost. Or maybe he’s not a fan of texting (people like that do exist) and just has bad texting habits.

If you practice assuming generously, you’ll find it easier to forgive and forget. We’re all human and make mistakes, and sometimes the silence isn’t intentional or about you at all.

Whatever the reason, a guy not texting you back shouldn’t ruin your day. You’ll start running all of these nonexistent scenarios in your head (he ran into Taylor Swift in the checkout line at Whole Foods, and they fell in love and jetted off to Rio with nothing but the clothes on their backs and her cats). This kind of thinking will only drive you nuts and cause misunderstandings.

3. Give Him Space

Probably the worst thing you could do when a guy stops texting you is to keep texting him. You could come off as desperate, clingy, obsessive, and controlling — it’s generally not a good look for a potential girlfriend.

Instead of harassing him, try backing off for a little bit and see if he comes around. You need to give him the chance to actually miss hearing from you.

Practice some self-control when you don’t get a text back. Send a friendly followup in a couple hours. Still nothing? Maybe tomorrow or the next day you can try again. When you do finally reach back out, it should be a happy, off-topic text. Don’t focus on the fact that he’s not replying. Your goal should be to make him smile — not feel guilty.

If he does respond, wait a little while before sending something back. I’m not saying play games, but it’s good to signal that you’re not sitting by the phone waiting for him to text you. You also have a busy life, and he can also wait on you. That being said, if you are interested in him, don’t leave him hanging too long.

4. Distract Yourself With Other Things

Bury yourself in work, go out with friends more often, start a new show on Netflix, actually make use of that gym membership — whatever you need to do to not think about him. This is the time to pay attention to the things in life that you might have put on hold while you were texting back and forth with him.

5. Try to Get Him to Do Something in Person

Men and women often communicate differently. While I could spend all day texting with my best friend, a guy would probably get annoyed (to say the least) if I text him about every little thing I’m doing.

He’d rather be with you in person than texting with you all day, so try to get him into the real world as quickly as possible. Avoid long texts and just ask him if he can meet you for a 5-minute coffee break.

6. Reach Out to Him in Another Way

If you’re following each other on Twitter, Instagram, or any other social media site, send him a quick tweet or comment just to see what’s up. You’ll want this to be fun and casual so you don’t come off like a creepy stalker. Send him a funny article or a link to something that interests him and see how he reacts.

7. Straight-Up Ask Him Why He Stopped Texting

If you just can’t move on without knowing why he disappeared, then you can come straight out and ask him. He may appreciate your directness. Or he may continue to be a coward and not answer you. Either way, you have nothing to lose, right?

It’s a good idea to use a curious rather than accusatory tone in that follow-up text conversation.

Try not to place too much blame or show a lot of anger in your message. After all, he could be in the middle of a personal crisis, and he won’t appreciate being disparaged via text. A simple, “Hey, what happened? Are you no longer interested?” should be enough to prompt a response for a typical, non-douchey person.

Maybe He’s Just Not That Into You

Ultimately, you can never really know why someone stopped texting you. And it can drive you crazy coming up with every possible reason and focusing so much energy on text messaging.

You can’t control when or if a person will text you back. The only thing you can control is how you react to it and move toward the love life you want.

I know I don’t have the patience for flaky men, so I recommend finding a new guy on Match and building a healthy relationship with healthy communication.

No matter which route you take, remember that you deserve a boyfriend who cares about you enough to not leave you hanging.

Advertiser Disclosure

DatingAdvice.com is a free online resource that offers valuable content and comparison services to users. To keep this resource 100% free, we receive compensation from many of the offers listed on the site. Along with key review factors, this compensation may impact how and where products appear across the site (including, for example, the order in which they appear). DatingAdvice.com does not include the entire universe of available offers. Editorial opinions expressed on the site are strictly our own and are not provided, endorsed, or approved by advertisers.

Our Editorial Review Policy

Our site is committed to publishing independent, accurate content guided by strict editorial guidelines. Before articles and reviews are published on our site, they undergo a thorough review process performed by a team of independent editors and subject-matter experts to ensure the content’s accuracy, timeliness, and impartiality. Our editorial team is separate and independent of our site’s advertisers, and the opinions they express on our site are their own. To read more about our team members and their editorial backgrounds, please visit our site’s About page.