How to Read Her Body Language

How Read Her Body Language
Updated:
Kara Pound
Lillian Castro

By: Kara Pound

Editor: Lillian Castro

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According to Jeremy Nicholson, M.S.W., Ph.D., in a blog post titled “Reading Basic Body Language for Dating and Persuasion Success” (Psychology Today), there are certain cues to look for clusters of positive or negative body language.

The following is how Dr. Nicholson defines the two. Read below while thinking about how the definitions relate to relationships.

Positive body language.

Your partner might move toward you and decrease the space between you two if she likes what you are doing or asking.

In addition, other liking behavior can include: leaning in toward you, feet pointing toward you and wiggling happily, legs uncrossed and comfortable, arms open and palms up, playfully fondling jewelry or hair, smiling, extended eye contact or looking down shyly.

Negative body language.

Your partner might move away from you and create space between you two if she dislikes what you are doing or asking.

In addition, other behaviors that signal dislike include: leaning away from you, feet pointed away from you, legs crossed and stiff, arms crossed, palms down, closed hands, itching eyes, scratching nose, rubbing back of neck, frowning, grimacing and turning the eyes away to the side.

Think about how you use your own body language and pay attention to any consistencies you and your girlfriend share. This will help you to read her body — both the positive and the negative. The body is an amazing vehicle to reading the woman you’re with.

Remember what English dancer, writer and broadcaster Deborah Bull once said, “Body language is a very powerful tool. We had body language before we had speech, and apparently, 80 percent of what you understand in a conversation is read through the body, not the words.”

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About the Author

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Kara Pound

By: Kara Pound

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Kara Pound is an award-winning journalist based in St. Augustine, Florida. She holds a bachelor's degree in journalism from Flagler College. Her work has been published in INKED, Natural Awakenings, Design Aglow, Memphis Flyer, Jacksonville Magazine, E/Environmental Magazine, and dozens more. Check out some of Kara's work at karapound.com.

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