Top 10 Best Sites
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Discovering the secret to finding a good woman has been a topic of conversation since the beginning of time, and the answers are constantly being updated, refined, discussed, and questioned. The phrase “where to meet a good woman” on Google nets around 1.6 billion responses. While I don’t think I’ll necessarily be reinventing the wheel or bringing to light some completely unique ideas, it’s important to keep revisiting the subject.
We get bogged down in our routines, and sometimes we just need a little reminder to get back out there and continue the adventure. With that said, here are my top 10 places to meet good women.
Yes, I know this tip may seem obvious, but most of us are on many online platforms, which includes dating sites, so it’s the easiest tip to start with. I would go with dating sites that cost money because you’ll find people who are committed (at least financially) to finding someone. Try not to be super specific in your filters, though, as that can create unrealistic expectations.
These are just a couple of our favorite dating sites here at DatingAdvice.com:
Friends, Dates, and Relationships
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Relationships: Friends, Dates, and Relationships
Match System: Browse by zip, age, appearance, more
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Match is like the cheese pizza of dating sites — it really doesn’t get any better. It’s been around the longest (1995), it has a nearly endless number of users (40 million+), and it’s the most successful (more dates, relationships, and marriages than any other dating site).
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Relationships: Serious Relationships
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EliteSingles caters to professional, educated, upper-income, and commitment-minded singles, and the site is responsible for 2,500 success stories a month.
Other ways to meet people online include through Instagram, LinkedIn, Facebook, Tumblr, or Snapchat. Follow people who have the same likes as you do, and use keywords (like in the following tips) to find people who are interesting and interested in fun things.
What many Americans may find surprising is that the concept of the date doesn’t really exist in France. There’s no “let’s meet just us two and do the getting-to-know-you-thing to see if we want to see more of each other.”
French people usually go out in groups and eventually pair off, so one of the big things to do is to attend one of the many dinner or house parties thrown by their friends. Everyone is always encouraged to bring new people to keep up the supply of interesting singles.
Be like the French and host or attend these parties as often as you can. Basically, everyone there has been vetted by other invitees, so you’ll have a good chance of meeting good people. Plus, you can always get the dirt on that cute girl by asking one of her friends about her. It’s low pressure, low risk, and high reward.
I feel like once most of us graduate college, we stop voluntarily trying to learn things. Sure, there’s the occasional work-related course or something, but when was the last time you took a class on something you wanted to learn more about? I’m not talking about spin classes or dance classes; I’m talking about classes at the local college or with a guest lecturer.
People who want to spend their free time adding to who they are are usually good people. I’m taking a self-publishing class this month. My wife just finished up a sewing class. There’s so much to learn out there, and I love being around curious people.
I know most of us may think we don’t have enough time to take an extra class, but this is bullshit and you know it. Everyone seems to have time for happy hours, video games, talking on the phone, napping, or bingewatching “The Magicians” (Watch it; it’s so good!).
Anything you’re interested in there’s a class for it, and if you can’t think of anything, maybe it’s time to start expanding your circle of knowledge. For people to find someone interesting, they usually have to be interested in something. What’s your thing?
There are tons of intramural/after-work/weekend warrior sports or activity leagues around the country. I played on a pool league for 10 years, and I loved it.
It got me out of the house, I befriended the people on my team, we got to meet people on the other team, and we would play at different bars every week. We got to know all the bartenders, locals, players, friends, owners, and randos in town. I would say that about half the players were women. It builds a great camaraderie, and you get to have a lot of fun. Having the ability to drink while playing was also a good draw.
If pool isn’t your thing, there are soccer, kickball, cornhole, dart, or board game leagues as well as lots of other types of organized events. Heck, in New York City, there’s even a Flip Cup league. Way to make drinking itself the intramural activity.
You would be hard-pressed to find evil and selfish people volunteering. Just by its definition, volunteering brings out people who are willing to sacrifice their own time to help others. To me, that’s a supersexy character trait. We all get so caught up in our own lives that we forget that with a mostly minimal effort on our part, we can help others better their lives.
There are so many different ways to donate your time that you’re sure to find a volunteering opportunity that aligns with your values. I love to build things, so I gravitate toward Habitat for Humanity. I am also the president of a park group, I started and run a farmers market, and I volunteer at local events around my neighborhood. If you’re meeting someone while doing these things, you already know a lot about that person’s moral compass. It’s almost like you can jump right past the getting-to-know-you questions and move on to the interesting stuff.
Carolinas Matchmaker Laurie Berzack has actually trademarked the term philanthrodating as a new way for singles to meet each other. “I always wanted to be a philanthropist. That’s something near and dear to my heart. Making a difference in the community has always been important in my work. Our clients are intellectual, down-to-earth, and living a wonderful lifestyle, but they’re starved for authentic connections, and that’s where I come in,” Laurie said.
The premise of philanthrodating is that engaging in acts of charity allows daters to create a strong foundation for a relationship. People who share similar values and interests naturally hit it off, and the teamwork involved in volunteerism facilitates building those bonds.
Personally, I love networking events. The point of going is specifically to meet other people in a nonthreatening type of way. I bring many of my clients to networking events to learn how to better talk to others, showcase themselves, and create new connections. As in tip number 5 above, people who attend these types of events are looking to actively better themselves. Whether it’s looking for a new job, making new professional connections, or just getting out there to possibly make some new friends, the events are tailor-made to facilitate meeting new people.
You can attend general networking events, like those found on NetworkAfterWork.com, or you can find events that are more geared toward your professional or personal leanings. However, don’t trap yourself into only talking to one or two people. Float around and try and meet as many people as you can. All of those people also have friends, coworkers, sisters, etc.
Music festivals can bring out the wild and wacky fans of the world, but they also bring out the adventurous, curious, and dedicated. When people are looking for potential partners, having the same taste in music is definitely a big plus.
Attending one of the myriad of festivals around the country or the world usually takes a lot of effort. The tickets are expensive, and many times the events are difficult to get to. Long lines, sub-par sleeping arrangements, and general jovial chaos can keep many people away. So, when you do meet someone there, you know right away that you’ve got much in common. Also, the general happy ambiance puts everyone in a good mood. You can just start dancing with each other.
If you’re the athletic type, or if you just like keeping active, try a different way of staying fit. I know most guys just want to do weights or jog, and that’s great. But many yoga, spin, and dance classes are heavily skewed toward females, and you might actually be the only guy in some of them.
I used to do yoga, and I really like what it did to my body. One of the side effects was that I was in a room of women almost exclusively in yoga pants. Not too shabby!
Not only will you not have a lot of competition from other guys, but the women may appreciate your evolved sense of gender roles. Now, here’s a caveat: It’s OK to take these classes to meet women, but be honest and upfront about it. Don’t leer at all the women and try and flirt with all of them. Just tell them you were looking at other ways of staying in shape and figured you might check out one with more women.
I love going to art shows, galleries, pop-ups, exhibitions, etc. Art brings out the creativity and, in my honest opinion, the intelligence of others. Each artistic piece, whether it’s abstract, still life, portrait, landscape, or sculpture, means something different to each person. It calls to mind one of my favorite scenes from an old Steve Martin movie.
It doesn’t just have to be an art museum either. Natural history museums, comic museums (like SocietyIllustrators.org), military museums, the SPAM museum, hair museums, medical museums (http://muttermuseum.org), or the cryptozoology museum: there are plenty of weird and interesting museums all over the world that will bring out the curious and interesting people of the world.
Go there with an open mind. While it’s good to look at the exhibits, it’s also really interesting to watch others experience the exhibits. It’ll tell you a lot of things about people. Some museums, like the Museum of Sex in NYC, are just ripe for fun and innuendo and naughtiness. Other museums, like the Liberty Science Center in Jersey City, have after-dark, adult-only nights with alcohol and DJs. You can grab a drink and learn physics all in one night.
As someone with an acting degree, I love improv. I also incorporate it into my coaching. Basically, life IS improv. We’re just reacting to stimuli and variables and trying to come up with the appropriate action/reaction.
Improv also teaches you to trust yourself, realize that everything will turn out OK, stretch your mental muscles, and laugh at yourself and others (nicely). The type of people who want to take improv classes are usually very interesting, confident, outside-the-box thinkers, and those are great characteristics of good women.
Good women are everywhere; it’s just that it may take a little extra effort to find them. However, at the end of the day, when you find a good woman, it makes everything worth it.