I’m Still in Love with My Ex. What Do I Do?

Rachel Dack

Written by: Rachel Dack

Rachel Dack

Rachel Dack is a licensed clinical professional counselor (LCPC) and relationship coach specializing in individual and couples psychotherapy. Rachel's areas of expertise include relationships, dating, mindfulness, anxiety, depression and self-esteem.

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Edited by: Lillian Castro

Lillian Castro

Lillian Guevara-Castro brings more than 30 years of journalism experience to ensure DatingAdvice articles have been edited for overall clarity, accuracy, and reader engagement. She has worked at The Atlanta Journal and Constitution, The Gwinnett Daily News, and The Gainesville Sun covering lifestyle topics.

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Reader Question:

Me and my ex recently had a son. I see will never get back together due to too many lies in the relationship.

I only get to see my son once a week because she is breastfeeding. Every time we see each other, it’s like we fall in love again. Then she goes home to her now-boyfriend. I miss her.

What do I do?

-Brad (Pennsylvania)

Rachel Dack’s Answer:

Hey Brad,

You are absolutely in a tough situation if you know you can’t be with your ex but have a son with her and have strong feelings for her each time you see her.

If it is clear the relationship is over, it sounds like you need to focus on moving on and moving forward. This can get a little tricky as co-parents, but it is absolutely doable and healthy.

It is only natural that feelings will arise each time you see her, so don’t judge yourself for this. You are connected because of your son and you are allowed to miss her.

Focus on you and what makes you feel happy and whole while committing to grieving the loss of the relationship and visualizing yourself moving forward.

Also, work to change your relationship with her from ex-lovers to co-parents. It will take time and effort to move on and be open to finding love with someone new, but know it is possible.

Take care,


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